A Dishonorable Knight (35 page)

Adjusting his breeches, Gareth took
another deep breath and entered the warm room. All the candles had been
extinguished and he realized he must have been outside longer than he
thought--everyone else seemed to have gone to bed. He forced himself to head
for the stairs leading to the big room above but paused with his foot on the
first step. Perhaps he should check on Elena and make sure the mead had not
made her ill. As he quietly made his way down the narrow hall to her room, his
conscience hollered that he was fooling himself if he thought he was just going
to be able to say goodnight and leave her.

He knocked softly on her closed door
and waited. When there was no answer, he knocked more loudly, hoping no one
else would hear and come investigate the pounding. After an agonizing several
moments, the door opened. Elena was standing in the doorway, her hair coming
out of her braid, spilling over her shoulder. The candlelight behind her shone
through her thin chemise, clearly outlining her ripe curves beneath.

"I just came to see if you were
alright," Gareth whispered. Elena said nothing, her face hidden in
shadows. He was feeling singularly embarrassed when she took a step closer to
him, her breasts grazing his chest. Despite the several layers of cloth
separating their skins, Gareth felt as if a hot brand had touched his chest.
With aching slowness he bent his head. Elena raised hers and their lips came together
in a slow, sensuous kiss unlike any of their past kisses. The spark, which was
constantly present between them, steadily grew as their kiss deepened and
Gareth slid his hands around her waist to clasp her tightly to him. Her hands
tangled in his hair and she kept his mouth on hers when he would have ended the
kiss.

Gareth groaned with disappointment
when Elena pulled back and stepped away from him. Without a word, she took his
hand and pulled him into the room, closing the door behind him. Turning, she
gazed at him steadily and Gareth caught his breath at her beauty in the soft
glow of the candle. With shaking hands, he cupped her face, tracing the
silkiness of her eyebrows, the smoothness of her skin, the fullness of her
lips. Without warning, the words "I love you" sprang to his lips, but
instead of uttering them, he pressed them onto her mouth, rubbed them into her
neck,
nibbled
them into her earlobe. His heart pounded
at the confession he had nearly made and he forced himself to focus on each inch
of smooth skin before him rather than wonder at his thoughts.

In contrast to their first night
together, their lovemaking that night was achingly slow and hypnotic in its
tenderness. When they were sated, their limbs lay tangled
together,
Elena's face nestled under Gareth's chin, his arms holding her pressed tightly
to his chest.

Though drowsy from mead and their
lovemaking, Gareth stayed awake long after Elena fell asleep. He had felt
responsible for their first night together and had worried that he had coerced
her into doing something she otherwise would not have done. But there was no
denying that she had initiated tonight's passions. Gareth smiled and pressed a
kiss to Elena's forehead as a thought occurred to him. Why had he worried so
about their first night together? When had he ever been able to convince--much
less coerce--Elena into doing something she did not want to do? That led to a
greater question: Why had Elena given herself to him?

For his part, he was not complaining.
He would drink in her scent, the feel of her skin, the curve of her body. He
would absorb every nuance of her expression and memorize every feature of her
face as well as every word she uttered because he was dreadfully sure that he
loved her. He loved her in spite of, and perhaps because of, her stubborn
willfulness and her blatant self-centeredness. He loved her because she had
risked her life to warn him of the abbess; because she had refused to grant him
quarter in any of their arguments; because he had never felt so comfortable in
another person's company than he had yesterday while roaming the streets of
Aberystwyth. He loved her even though once they returned to England she would
disappear into the untouchable realm of the ladies-in-waiting; even though he
would be forced to watch her marry the despicable earl; even though he would
then participate in the destruction of her comfortable world. Another stone
settled on Gareth's shoulders and he pulled Elena even closer to him, wishing
there was a way he could take her back to Eyri Keep. He would marry her in an
instant if he thought she would be content to be the wife of a mere knight, but
while she had made expressly clear that she wanted him in her bed tonight, she
had never even intimated that she wanted him to wed.

Gareth swallowed his disappointment
as best he could and bent his head to kiss Elena's parted lips. Within seconds,
she stirred and sleepily returned his kiss. Gareth's body, unburdened by the
weight on his soul, immediately leapt into a state of arousal. As he moved on
top of her, the covers they would not need to stay warm slipped to the floor.

Elena opened her eyes to the late
morning sun pouring in the small, high window. She stretched lazily, feeling
like a cat full of cream and napping in the sunlight, so content was she.
Gareth's warm back was pressed against her side and she rolled over, sliding
her arm around his waist and pressing her breasts to his warm skin as images of
the past night flashed through her mind. A smile warmed her lips as she thought
of the heretofore unguessed-at pleasures Gareth had treated her body to. Never
again would she be able to hear a young bride warned against the unpleasantness
of the wedding night without laughing. Unpleasantness indeed!

The thought of a wedding night dimmed
Elena's smile. Once again she worried she would not be able to convince Richard
to break her betrothal to Brackley. She had thought to beg him to betroth her
to Lord Edgeford, but the thought of marriage to the pasty young lord was suddenly
as distasteful as that to Brackley had been.

Elena's hand eased itself down along
Gareth's hip, her nails absently scratching the muscled thigh. She inhaled
sharply, a vision of herself as the lady of Eyri Keep filling her mind, and
this time she did not fight it. Unbidden, a series of images paraded through
her head: the keys of Eyri Keep at her belt as she instructed servants on the
renovations of the stone lodging; Enid and she laughing at the antics of Gareth
and Cynan as they played with children (Children? a disbelieving voice in her
head asked); Gareth coaxing the peasants at her parent's estate into producing
more than her father had ever been able to wheedle; endless nights spent just
like the previous one.

Elena sighed. She had never in her
life experienced uncertainty. Fear, yes--had not the last month taught her that
emotion well
?-
-but never uncertainty. She had no idea
how she would even go about making those visions reality. From his derision of
her engagement, she was most certain Gareth would insist on loving his wife and
she really had no idea if he cared for her in that way at all. She had been
making men fall in love with her since she was barely a woman with a smile
here, a look there, but Gareth was different from all those men. Had she not
had that very thought a hundred times before? He was different and she wasn't
sure she could make him love her as she had all those others. She was beginning
to realize that what she had heretofore thought of as love was in fact nothing
more than empty infatuation.

Elena pressed her lips to Gareth’s
warm, smooth back. The wild thought that she should simply admit her feelings
to him and propose marriage made her heart pound so that she feared he would
feel it beating against his back. No, she could do that! Perhaps if she implied
that since he had taken her virginity, he was not obligated to marry her.

With a newfound maturity, Elena
realized that she would not coax Gareth into marriage simply based on their two
nights spent together. She had given herself to him freely and to backtrack and
say that he now owed her something was not honorable. Besides, she wanted a man
who felt obligated to wed her even less than one who saw her as a witless prize
to be won.

Wishing her problems would simply
solve themselves and determined not to spoil the present by worrying over them,
Elena pushed herself to her elbow and began nibbling on Gareth's ear. He
swatted lazily in the general vicinity of his ear before slipping back into a
deep slumber. Elena giggled as she wiggled up further on the bed to gain a
better position. Taking a strand of her long hair, she tickled his nose with
the end of it, straining not to laugh as he wiggled and rubbed it. Finally
unable to stand it any longer, Elena rolled Gareth onto his back and climbed on
top of him, tickling him and poking him playfully.

Gareth squinted at the bright light
and groggily raised his head.

"Wake up, you slug-a-bed, wake
up! Or I shall tickle you until you do!"

"You think so, do you?" he
grumbled, his voice deliciously deep and raspy with sleep.

"Aye, that I do!" she said
with a laugh.

So quickly that she did not even
realize what was happening, Gareth bucked her off of him and rolled over to
smother her with his weight, his fingers tickling her ribs, her ears, and the
tender skin behind her knees. Elena's short scream of laughter was swallowed by
Gareth's mouth. Immediately, Elena's mirth subsided as she gave herself over to
the languorous pleasure of his kiss.

A knock on the door caused them both
to jump guiltily and move to opposite sides of the bed, clutching the covers
between them. "Yes?" Elena called out. The door, which never quite
latched all the way, was open a crack.

"Pardon, good lady," came
Samuel's voice through the door. "I was wondering if you were alright. We
heard you yelp."

Elena's experience at fabricating
excuses for Lady Elizabeth quickly rose to the surface. "Oh yes, I'm quite
alright. I stubbed my toe as I was getting back into bed, that's all."

"Oh, of course, my lady. We have
some fresh milk and early berries if you will be arising soon."

"Thank you but I'm not feeling
well this morning. I think it must have been the mead last night. I believe I
will remain abed this morning if not all day." Elena smiled mischievously
in response to Gareth's raised eyebrows.

"Ah, um, very good." The
voice paused hesitantly. "My lady?"

"Yes?"

"You wouldn't have happened to
know where Gareth disappeared to, do you?"

"As a matter of fact, I
do,"
Elena
said, enjoying the look of horror in
Gareth's widened eyes. "He knocked on my door earlier this morning to
check on me and he told me he was going down to the dock today to see if he
could sail out with one of the fishermen."

"Fishermen, my lady?"

"Yes, I believe he is thinking
of becoming a fisherman, should his career as a knight not prove
lucrative."

Gareth bit his lip to keep from
laughing out loud.

"Oh," said Samuel.
"Well, uh, I'm sorry to have disturbed you. Thank you." They could
hear Samuel shuffling from foot to foot outside the door. "Sleep well,
Lady Elena."

"Thank you Samuel."

"If you need anything, just
holler, er, call."

"I will do that. Good bye
Samuel." 

"Er... goodbye."

Elena pushed the door closed again,
wedging her boots against it to keep it from opening again, and flopped back
down onto the bed, her arms cradling her head as she looked at Gareth with a
cocky grin.

"Remind me not to believe a word
you say through a closed door," Gareth said before he bent down and kissed
her on the nose.

"You don't know how many times I
had to tell King Richard that Lady Elizabeth was ill, when really all she
wanted was to avoid his continuing attempts to convince her to marry him."

"Was he that persistent?"

"Oh yes." Elena said,
preoccupied. She wondered if Elizabeth had viewed wedding Richard with the same
distaste she viewed wedding Brackley. Against her will, Elena thought of the
other complaints against King Richard. There were the missing nephews, of
course. She had always avoided thinking of them because if Richard had caused
them to be done away with, what might he do to a mere lady-in-waiting should
she displease him?

"Why do you think he was so
adamant that she marry him? Did he love her?" Gareth asked.

"I don't see how. They rarely
spent any time together and she was always exceedingly cold to him."

"Then what made him continue his
pursuit?" Gareth asked as he lay down beside her and ran his hands over
her smooth stomach.

"I imagine he thought marrying
her would quiet any speculation that he didn't belong on the throne."

"Don't you think that was wrong
of him?"

"I suppose." The subject of
Richard on her mind, Elena asked, "I still don’t understand why you have
decided to return to him? I thought you disagreed with everything he stands
for."

Gareth was obviously uncomfortable
and toyed absently with her breast, apparently unaware that her breathing was
growing more ragged.