Bait: A dark erotic thriller (Hunter & Prey Book 2) (9 page)

Shrugging on a fluffy bathrobe—and wincing as it touched my singed skin—I started to pace, not bothering with turning on the lights.
 

Had I done the right thing? I forced myself to answer that with a “yes”—and it wasn’t like I’d had much of a choice, really. Not if I wanted to mime the alluring temptress. After everything he’d done to me, playing coy hadn’t been an option—not as he’d cut right to the chase.
 

Had it been my plan? No, not exactly, but it wasn’t just convenience that had me skip the underwear tonight. Part of me—hidden deep down, nowhere close to being recognized—had played with the idea of outright seducing him, even if I didn’t want to acknowledge that. Although, as seductions went, I hadn’t really had much opportunity to dip deep into my repertoire, and it remained to be questioned who had seduced whom.

Thinking back to how his hand had felt on my throat, a shudder ran through my body, making me keel over and retch, but I managed to swallow my bile back down. The memory was repulsive, enough to make me want to jump right back into the shower and continue to boil myself…

But at the same time I felt my nipples harden and wetness appear between my legs, my body oh so ready for more. With a sinking feeling in my gut I realized that if he strode through my door now, I wouldn’t speak up in protest. And I wouldn’t just let him take me, no—I would jump his bones and fuck myself raw on him, until we’d both be too tired and spent to move.

Not even the knowledge that he could have easily killed me tonight helped to dampen, let alone douse, those flames.
 

Would I have tried to stop him? Tried to pull his fingers from around my throat if he'd tried to strangle me? Tried to hold on if he’d shoved me over that balustrade?
 

Eight months ago the answer had been “yes” to everything—and I hadn’t even stopped at mangling myself. If I’d had the choice, I might have even sawed off my own limb to escape, like a wild animal caught in a trap would bite off his paw. Back then, seducing him had been a cold, calculated move—my only option to ram that sliver into his neck to try to end his life. Back then, things had been so easy—either fight to survive, or die.

But now? Now I had options. Sure, they might be severely limited, and I had no illusions that if I tried to elude him, he would come after me with full force. Yet right now I was free. I could have not gone to the opera. I could have not gotten up in the middle of the show. I could have not maneuvered myself into a corner.
 

I could have jumped, ending my life but leaving him not the cause for it.

And it wasn’t like the terrace wrapping around half of my suite wasn’t tempting in its own way right this very second.

Why didn’t I? Jump, that was. It would be a horrible yet quick end. Just one push, a few seconds to come to grips with my decision, and that would be the end. I would never have to be afraid. I would never have to be so disgusted with myself that it was impossible to breathe.

I would never feel his touch on my skin; his scent teasing my nose; his words undoing me.

With a sick kind of fascination, I realized that it was as much my need for revenge that drove me on, as the hope to be that close to him again. And again. And again.

That left me wondering—had I actually been intent on killing him the first time? I had to try to survive—but had I actually attempted to succeed? Or was it no coincidence that we’d both limped away from that night, leaving us to meet again another day?

Ever since that night, I’d ignored finding an answer to that question. I hadn’t lied to Adam when I’d said that I needed to get away and disappear—forever. I had been careful, never making a mistake—and never leaving a trace. It would have been so easy to be careless—or to deliberately do something to tip Darren off. Access my accounts. Call one of my former acquaintances. Use my real social security number when applying for the next useless job. I hadn’t even been tempted, just afraid that, whatever I did, I would never be able to get away. I’d even started to hope that I could move on, accept this new life, pretend—for Adam’s sake—that I was feeling for him what I knew he wanted me to tell him.
 

But all that had been a lie, I realized as I stared blindly at the lights of the city sprawling below me. A lie that I’d told Adam. A lie that I’d told myself, over and over again—but it had never fully sunk in.
 

I’d been playing a role, mostly because it was expected of me, but also because, for a little while, I had to, or else I couldn’t have continued dragging myself on.

But now my wounds were healed—at least those on the outside. Agent Smith had made it impossible for me to continue to run—and the fact that I was still alive proved that Darren’s number one goal wasn’t to end my life the second he could.

So what game was he playing? He obviously still wanted me—tonight had sealed that deal. For whatever reason, he kept that girl around, though she clearly posed no obstacle for him.
 

But if not to kill me now, what else did he have in mind? Drag me back into his basement to finish what he had started? I had a distinct feeling that the basement was empty now, not even a thread left to hint at what had been stored there for countless years. Or had the fact that I had gotten away—and almost killed him in the process—turned the tables? Could it be possible that now, for the first time ever, he actually saw me as his equal? A force to be reckoned with; danger lurking below, ready to lash out if he provoked me? Was that what had driven him to follow me out onto that balcony and rut like animals, in that life-affirming, mindless act of… acquiescence?

In many ways, that thought was more terrifying than knowing that he was out to kill me.
 

That I even considered it made something else crystal clear—it was about time that I dropped the pretense that this wasn’t the reason why I’d felt so very alive tonight.

Disgusted I might be by my own allegiance—but there was still a thread of decency buried under all those mired, conflicting emotions.

Snatching my purse from the floor, I got out my phone and dialed the number of a taxi service. Even though it was well past midnight by now, I got the confirmation that a car would pick me up in ten minutes in front of the hotel. Letting the robe drop onto the floor next to the gown, I stalked into my dressing room and pulled on a shirt and jeans, pretty much the only casual outfit I could find on short notice. Not bothering with makeup, I grabbed my purse and left—to cut loose the last remaining strings that still connected me to that scared, scarred little girl that had been in need of rescue.

I wasn’t surprised that Adam was still awake—nor that he’d clearly been waiting for me. It still irked me that all my electronics were bugged, but that much I owed him—if I was dooming myself, at the very least I should get him out of this to do with his life as he pleased. It was eerie to step into the building that had been my home for almost the entire past decade, and the place of so many fond memories. It wasn’t completely untainted—for one, it had been the place where my flight had really started. For another, it was unlikely I would ever forget what Ray had done, even if I managed to smile into his face afterward. The knowledge that it had all been Darren’s plan to tear down my defenses just made me taste bile at the back of my tongue.

Agent Smith and her team had been busy in the meantime, I realized, when Adam opened the door for me and I saw that the entire wall that had stood between our apartments was gone, turning the central, already open floor space into one huge room. I heard snoring from what used to be my bedroom—now obviously furnished again—and Adam wordlessly preceded me onto the terrace. Just like old times. I followed, swallowing the quip that he could at least have fired up the coffee machine.

I wasn’t here to exchange pleasantries, so evoking pleasant memories wasn’t on the menu.

The door closed behind us and I turned to face Adam, but before I could do more than open my mouth, he silenced me with a gentle finger against my lips. Our months together had done a lot to even out the emotional barriers between us—while we’d had sex a couple of times before all this had gone down, we’d never been truly intimate. Unlike with my other clients, I’d always been kind of myself with him—no need to pretend when it was just the whore and the hacker enjoying coffee together, so why switch things up when things got physical? But there’d never been any casual touching. He’d never made a move to engage in behavior like that, and I’d been careful to keep my distance. Casual sex with your friend who just so happens to be an escort? Uncomplicated fun that came with the perks of her being a pro at pretty much everything you could ever imagine. But dating a whore? That’s not something most men could stomach.

Or any, really, I corrected myself. What acceptance Darren had shown in the beginning had obviously been just to lull me into complacency, so he could better manipulate me into burning all those bridges myself.
 

After Darren, I’d needed that intimacy that I’d never allowed to exist between Adam and me. I’d needed him, plain and simple. A warm body next to me in those nights where every creak made me jump and scream; the assuring weight that made me feel safe and comforted, even if I’d known it was all superficial and lies. A friend—another human being—in the same boat with me.

But never what he wanted me to be—a lover, or a loved one.

And now that he looked deep into my eyes, his face illuminated by the lights spilling out onto the terrace, I saw the acknowledgment of all that sinking in. He’d probably always known it—but now it was impossible to ignore any longer.

Adam exhaled slowly as he removed his hand, using it to rake his fingers through his hair in a gesture of utter frustration.

“Anything you want to report to the suits? Because Eva’s really not happy with your utter lack of progress.”

“Eva?” I asked dryly.

He gave a noncommittal grunt. “If you live together with someone long enough, it’s hard to keep your guard up.”

Ouch—but I definitely deserved that one. And everything else that I knew was still waiting for me.

“Good plans need time to be set in motion,” I reminded him, but forced my scorn down. “I’m ready to take over business from Brigitte, both in name and deed. As you already know, no doubt, we went to the opera together. Kind of my twisted presentation to society, if you want to call it that. I have an appointment Friday morning with Alison Moss. I don’t know what she wants with me, but she was a lot more welcoming than I’d expected. My guess is that she’s looking for some discreet contacts for clients of hers. The fact that there’s no lawsuit whatsoever filed against her darling Darren must be proof enough for her that she can trust me.” I paused, but then spilled the rest, too. “I also met him. And he’s definitely still interested in me. So, actually, the plan is already in motion.”

Adam stared at me blankly, making me wonder if my words had even registered.

“Did you fuck him?”

The question surprised me only so much, as did the hard, gravelly tone of his voice.

“That’s none—“

“Did. You. Fuck. Him?” he asked again, louder now.
 

There was no sense in denying it—and it wasn’t like anything but instant protest wouldn’t have already served as an answer—but it hurt that I couldn’t let him down gently.

“Yes.”

I expected him to cringe away, but the acceptance on his face was like a punch in my gut.
 

“You’re not even denying it,” he rasped out, swallowing hard.

“I owe you—“

“You owe me nothing,” he shouted, his temper rising. “I mean, what did I expect? You’re a whore. Of course you do what whores do. They fuck, even the men who legitimately tried to kill them.”

I felt my spine go rigid but forced my body to remain as relaxed as possible, which wasn’t saying much.
 

“We both know that it was going to happen sooner or later,” I offered, not quite defending myself. “And as it helps with the plan—“

“What fucking plan, Penelope?” Adam ground out. “We both know that there is no plan. The only reason why you’re back here is because you’re too stupid to save yourself. Because you still want him. Still need him. Because you’re still in love—“

He cut off there and turned away, his shoulders rising in what looked awfully like a suppressed sob. It hurt me to see Adam in so much pain, but really, there was no way to alleviate his anguish now. The only thing I could do was make sure that it wouldn’t go on for much longer.

“I told you,” I started, reaching for his arm but he shook me off, not even turning to face me. “I tried. Adam, I really tried. And I know how fucked up this is. How fucked up I am. But there never was anything but friendship and respect between us, and there never will be—“

“Respect? What do you know of respect?” he asked, whipping around, glaring at me. “You don’t even have an ounce of self-respect. How would you know how to respect someone else?”

That wasn’t fair, but I didn’t speak up to deny his claim.

“That was never the point—“

Once more he interrupted me. “There is no fucking point!” he accused. “You were too stupid to see any of the signs, and now you’re too stupid to even save yourself. I thought you’d wised up when you came crawling to me, bruised and beaten, but clearly, that flicker of sense has long since died.”

There was nothing I could have offered in my defense, so I didn’t even try.

“You always knew this,” was what I said instead.

“Yeah, guess I did,” he admitted—another punch that landed right on. “Guess that makes me fucked in the head, too.”

“Or me just really good at what I do,” I pointed out. When he narrowed his eyes at me, clearly trying to hide the hurt in them, I forced myself to go on. “You do realize that I’ve been playing you the entire time? Appealing to your savior complex? I knew you’d do anything for me, Adam. I knew that you were in love with me. And I manipulated you, when I needed you. If I’d had an ounce of decency, I would have cut ties with you as soon as I got away, or never come back to ask for your help. Instead, I got you back to where you started. All that because of me.”