Bilgarra Springs (23 page)

‘You didn’t mention Gran and Will, Fiona. Not once. You could have quite easily when I brought the photo out to you on the verandah last week, but you didn’t. How exactly do you expect I am feeling? It’s bad enough that Gran chose this method to spring this little secret, well maybe not so little if I am honest, on me. You could have at least warned me.’

Fiona didn’t react to the anger that had started to flow out of Aurora.

‘You tell me what you think I should have done. Aurora, if Isabella hadn’t already told you, who was I to break her confidence? Just because she is not longer with us is not a good enough reason to do that. I knew that you would find out for yourself. What good would it have done for me to mention it? Please, tell me in what way I have failed you...’

Aurora’s shoulders drooped as the anger drained away. If she were honest, she had been looking for someone to blame, and Fiona had been as good a candidate as anyone. The old lady’s eyes were full of sadness and compassion. Aurora pushed her hand through her hair before placing it back on the railing and looking out. Fiona came to stand beside her.

‘I’m sorry Fiona. I have been acting like a spoiled brat, I know. It’s just...the entries in Gran’s journal have sort of rocked the foundations a little. I have had to doubt the solid marriage that I thought that my grandparents had.’

Aurora paused for a few seconds.

‘And being here, amongst you all, now knowing that Gran also spent around a month here and was in love with Will...in my mind that sort of makes you all a bit guilty too, even though I know that isn’t logical.’

Fiona placed her hand on Aurora’s forearm.

‘Come and sit down love and I will tell you what actually happened.’

Fiona gave Aurora’s arm a gentle squeeze before making her way over to the Adirondack chairs and settling herself. Aurora followed, leaning forward with her elbows on her knees, staring at the ground. She couldn’t miss the sadness in Fiona’s voice when she started to speak.

‘You’ve read already how Isabella and Charles came to be here. Her first week with us after Charles left was an eye opener for everybody. We couldn’t believe the life that she had come from and she couldn’t comprehend the lifestyle that we led. To give credit where credit is due, she was bright and a hard worker and she learnt fast. There was nothing that she wouldn’t try and whatever she did, she gave it her everything. As you know, when you are all together all day every day a closeness develops, even if you don’t want it to. None of us noticed what was happening between Will and Isabella until it was too late. To be honest, I don’t think that they were aware of what was developing between them. Will always kept to himself. He was never one for socialising, not that we get much chance out here, but even on the odd occasion, he was still quite reserved. He noticed everything and said very little. There were women who had tried to snag him before your grandmother came along, and there were several after, but she was the only one who really caught his eye. He wasn’t himself for a long while after she left.’

Fiona paused for a moment.

‘I won’t lie to you Aurora, and I can’t speak for Eloise and Harold, although I think they had their suspicions, but Arthur and l knew what was going on but we chose to overlook it. Whether we were wrong or right in doing that, the way we saw it, love like that doesn’t come along very often and sometimes there really is no choice in whom one falls in love with. Cut off out here as we were, it was easy to forget that she had a life somewhere else, with someone else. And she changed so much. The city girl socialite was, I think, probably gone forever. The way I figured, Isabella had a choice to make. She could either stay, which would have given Charles grounds to divorce her, or she could return home. As you know, she chose the latter. I don’t envy her having to make that decision. It was a no win situation. It didn’t matter what she did, somebody was going to pay the price. I know it sounds wrong to you, Aurora, but I loved her like a sister. All I wanted was for her to be happy. Personally, I think she would have been happier had she stayed, but it wasn’t my choice to make.’

Fiona let out a huge sigh.

‘I only ever saw her again once after she left here. I would have loved to see her in Sydney, and she had issued an open invitation, but there was always something too much work going on, too wet to be able to get out, young children. She came back for Will’s funeral. He was only 59 when he died. You wouldn’t remember, you were only a toddler at the time. She grieved his loss more than all of us put together. In the cemetery, she walked up to his casket, unclasped the gold heart locket and chain from around her neck and threw it on top of the rose petals that we had thrown there. It broke my heart. She told me later that he had bought her the locket on the day that he had taken her to the train so that she would always have something to remember him by. He took her in to be photographed so that he would have something to remember her by. She had it on in the photo. As silly as it sounds, it was the only link left between them.’

Fiona looked at Aurora, tears glistening in her eyes.

‘I found the photo after Will died. I had worked out what must have happened and your grandmother confirmed it. He kept that photo in the drawer beside his bed. I tucked it into Isabella’s journal for safekeeping.’

The incredible sorrow that Aurora could hear in Fiona’s voice brought tears to her own eyes. Fiona’s voice wobbled as she continued.

‘There’s also a letter tucked into the back of the journal. That arrived before Christmas in the year that Isabella left. I placed it on the hall stand with the rest of the mail. Will knew it was there but after a week it disappeared. I found it in the drawer with the photo. I don’t think he ever opened it. I don’t think that he could bear it if Isabella had told him that she had made the right choice. I’m only guessing though. He never spoke of it and I didn’t open it. Like him, I didn’t want to know what it said. Your grandmother never mentioned it either. It has sat here for sixty-five years. Maybe it has waited for you.’

Fiona looked away then but not before Aurora noticed a sole tear making its way down her cheek. Leaving Fiona space to collect herself, Aurora pushed herself up and made her way over to the railing. She let a few minutes go by before she spoke.

‘Gran mentioned a Jacaranda tree in her journal. Where was it?’

Fiona levered herself up and made her way down the verandah to the other side of the stairs. She lifted her hand and pointed to a spot in front of the house.

‘It used to be right there. It was beautiful. I don’t know why, but it bloomed out of season that year. They generally bloom in late October, early November, but it was still laden in January. Isabella used to put one of the flowers behind her ear. She loved them. We had a storm late in the afternoon of the day following her departure. Lightning struck the tree and split it in half. Will was like a man possessed the next day. He took the axe to the tree and didn’t stop until there was nothing left but a carpet of purple on the ground.’

Fiona was silent again, lost in her memories. Aurora’s voice brought her back to the present.

‘There’s one in the front yard of Gran’s house. It’s been there forever.’

At that moment, Kate and Harriet came barrelling through the front door, their voices full of excitement, launching themselves at their grandmother. Rough and Tumble had heard the noise and were running as fast as their little legs could carry them to be part of the action. The moment was broken and Aurora gently squeezed Fiona’s hand that was sitting on the railing before making her way through the house to the kitchen. She wasn’t sure whether she felt better or worse but she was grateful to Fiona. As she knew herself, sometimes the living still had to deal with the ghosts of the past.

sixteen

B
ack against the
W
all

Bilgarra Springs was a hive of activity on the Friday. Everybody was madly trying to get everything done so that they could leave for Townsville early Saturday morning. Since their chat, the easiness had returned to the relationship between Fiona and Aurora. The same couldn’t be said about things between Aurora and Callan. He hadn’t spoken to her at all since her explosion on Wednesday. Aurora supposed that she couldn’t blame him, she did have an awful lot of baggage which was probably very off-putting, and she had punched him after all.

She had been incredibly surprised mid-morning when he had asked her to come out to the front dams with him incredibly surprised and awfully uncomfortable when she was alone in the cab of the Cruiser with him. She needn’t have worried because he took the initiative very quickly.

‘I’ve been thinking about what you told me on Wednesday.’

Aurora was looking down at her hands. Lack of acknowledgement from her didn’t deter him. In fact he was looking out the windscreen anyway.

‘You had no control over what happened to you and I played no part in it. But we do have control over how we deal with it. I don’t think any less of you for it. In fact quite the opposite, I think that you are incredibly strong...courageous even. I’m sorry that it happened to you and I want you to know that not all men are like that. I would never hit a woman, no matter the provocation. I need you to understand that.’

At this point he did look towards her and she briefly met his eyes, giving nothing away, before she turned to look out the window.

‘Look, I don’t play with people’s feelings and I fully intend to pursue what we started last weekend. I wouldn’t have kissed you if I hadn’t had feelings for you and they haven’t changed. I’ve struggled to find time alone to be with you without making us the subject of discussion with the others. I would imagine at the moment that they are having a field day with the fact that we have headed out together. I don’t care. This is too important to be bothered with what they think.’

Finally, Aurora turned her to look at him, her eyes following his profile. She found him an attractive man. His strong features suited his take charge personality. Cal sensed her looking at him and met her eyes very briefly before stopping the car in the middle of nowhere. He slid sideways and took her face in his hands and kissed her, slowly at first, but ended fiercely, taking her breath away. When he pulled back she was feeling more than a little dazed. She had never been kissed like that. Gran’s words from the journal and her experience with Will flashed through Aurora’s mind. Callan had definitely claimed her and branded her soul in the process.

Cal was feeling a little stunned himself. He had meant to be gentle with her; instead he had kissed her with an intensity that had shocked him. He looked her squarely in the eye.

‘Look Ro, I’m sorry I didn’t mean for that to get out of hand.’

In frustration he dragged his hands through his hair, grabbing one of hers when he finished. His shortening of her name had caught Aurora’s attention. She had never had anyone shorten it. Ordinarily she would have protested, but she couldn’t help liking the gravelly way that he had said it. After a brief hesitation Cal continued.

‘Let’s just take this one step at a time. That is if you want to. So far I’ve done all the talking and I haven’t stopped to listen to what you have to say.’

He took a second to study her face, then squeezed her hand as he spoke.

‘If it’s not what you want, well, I will understand. I am so far removed from what you are used to...’

Cal let his words peter out and shrugged, before quietly adding a bit more.

‘Or if it is simply that you don’t want to see where it goes well that’s okay too...’

His words fell into the silence. Aurora squeezed his hand back.

‘One day at a time Cal. Let’s see how we go.’

Her smile at the end was all the encouragement that he needed. He leant in and kissed her again, gently this time, but very thoroughly. Just for good measure, she kissed him back.

They had certainly returned later in the day to a lot of good natured ribbing. Fortunately for them, the crew were much too excited about the upcoming football game to give them too hard a time. The evening had passed quickly with all deciding to retire early.

An early rise and all were in the cars heading to Townsville. Aurora wasn’t driving this time, so she had a better chance to look around. It was no less beautiful than what she had remembered. She was still struck by the countryside. Sydney’s Harbour was certainly stunning but this was at the very least its equal. They had arrived in Townsville, checked into their motel rooms and headed down to one of the bars on the strand that overlooked the ocean.

As usual, the group enjoyed themselves. They seemed to be a portable party of sorts. Aurora had been very conscious of Keith this time, but he had stayed well away from her, taking his sport with the young girls that were hanging around. Cal had remained at her side, but there had been no chance for any time alone and she guessed that neither of them were ready yet for public displays of affection.

The football had been a match to remember, not so much for the match itself, but for the atmosphere that had filled Dairy Farmer’s Stadium. The locals had been vocal in the extreme and in the face of the team’s lack of form, their support hadn’t wavered. Despite living in Sydney, the supposed home of rugby league, Aurora had never attended a match. Peter had followed Rugby Union, more to be one of the boys than out of genuine passion for the game.

She had loved being a part of the atmosphere and relished the experience of enjoying the game with the group from Bilgarra Springs. They were starting to become friends and she was sure that when the month was over, in just under two weeks time, she would miss them terribly. Living and working day in and day out with the same group of people forced a genuine bond. Being very much a loner by nature, a situation which was pushed to extreme limits by her violent ex-husband, she didn’t have many close friends. Aurora’s professional life was full of acquaintances and she hadn’t noticed until now the lack of closeness. Funny how things worked out.

The slowing of the taxi minibus as it pulled over at the hotel jolted Aurora out of her reverie. Music was pumping out of the beer garden and people had spilled out of its confines and were milling about everywhere. As she emerged from the taxi she was struck by the good vibe that seemed to be buzzing in the air. Peter would have positively died before he went to a beer garden. He had only liked to frequent upper class establishments. Having met him so young had robbed her of the chance to hang out with other young people in places such as this, at the time in her life when she would have enjoyed it the most. Her eyes were darting everywhere, checking everything out, especially some of the clothes that the younger crowd were wearing. She hoped that some of the girls hadn’t paid too much for their outfits as there wasn’t a whole stack of material involved in them. She inwardly groaned. She was starting to think old. Still, she wouldn’t be caught dead in some of those outfits herself.

Matt started cutting a path through the throng of people and as the minibus pulled away from the kerb and the others were swallowed up into the crowd, Cal reached forward for Aurora’s hand, tugging her to a standstill. She shot him a brief look of surprise over her shoulder.

He drew her gently away from the others, whom she had been blindly following, and stepped around the far side of the tree, out of general view, draping his arms around her. Aurora laced her arms around his neck, standing on tiptoe in anticipation of what she thought was coming. Cal, however, just stood there for what felt like an eternity, looking at her, studying her face. He took a small step closer, gently pulled her to him, and claimed her mouth with a sweetness and gentleness so at odds with the passion that she knew he was capable of unleashing. This time his kiss was an outpouring of affection.

He released her mouth and took a small step back. She opened her eyes to see him smiling at her with a look of adoration. Her heart turned over and she smiled back. This man really was an enigma to her, but she liked him really liked him in a way that was completely new. He moved closer and dropped the briefest of kisses against her mouth.

‘I have wanted to do that all day. Let’s go join the others before we’re missed.’

She had no chance to reply before he tugged her hand, quickly pulling her against him and placing one last quick kiss on her lips before making his way with her in tow back through the crowd. To Aurora’s befuddled brain, the people seemed to have swelled in number, the music grown louder and the vibe increased. She was struggling to properly take in her surroundings. Her brain was positively fizzing.

They’d reached the others, who were standing around a tall table, before her mind had fully grasped hold of the turn of events. Callan had kept hold of her hand even after they’d reached the others. He now stood at her left shoulder, their arms not quite touching but their fingers linked. She was incredibly self-conscious. Whether the others had noticed the growing attraction between her and Cal was anybody’s guess. She figured that they must have and she dropped her eyes. She was so conscious of him holding her hand that it seemed to her that they had a neon sign above their heads announcing it to the world. Aurora decided it would be best to pretend that it was the most natural thing in the world and threw a smile at Heather and Con who were standing on other side of the table, deciding to go with the flow.

Before she knew it Mike returned from the bar and placed a drink in her hand. Keith was to Aurora’s right, not too close to her though. Out of the corner of her eye she glimpsed Cal sneak a look over her shoulder. Next thing she knew he had dropped her hand and snaked an arm around her shoulders, putting it beyond doubt where Keith, as well as every other male, stood.

Aurora dropped her eyes again. Crap. It wasn’t that she didn’t like this new possessive, affectionate side of Callan, it was simply that it was still so new and now it was on show to everybody else. Oh well, in for a penny in for a pound as her grandmother used to say. Keith flicked his eyes from the arm to Cal and finally to Aurora. Aurora noticed that a look of anger mingled with cynicism flashed across his features, but he must have decided not to antagonise Cal and remained silent, turning his attention to the table of girls standing behind them. Aurora thought that a good move on his part and briefly wondered how thick the guy must be if he didn’t get the message when Cal had punched him at the wedding. She had to admit that she loved the feel of his arm around her. She wasn’t generally much of a touchy feely type, but this she was enjoying. He even kissed her on the top of the head before going to the bar for another round of drinks.

As much as she was having a great time, Aurora was missing Theresa’s company and hoped she was enjoying herself. Theresa had been very vocal about what they could do with their football match and stated in very clear terms that she fully intended to spend the whole time alone with Brett. She had jokingly added that she saw them every day and she had no intention of missing out on some alone time for her and Brett. Aurora appreciated the sentiment; she would kill for a weekend alone with Cal herself and as much as she had enjoyed the football, if it came to a choice there would be no competition, Cal would win hands down.

There was a makeshift dance floor and with a quick word to Con, Cal had dragged Aurora off to dance. At the end of the song he had grabbed her by the hand and led her off in the opposite direction, straight out of the beer garden and hailed a taxi. Before she had time to blink, he was helping her in before climbing in beside her, closing the door and giving the driver the address of their motel. Aurora spun around to face him.

‘Cal, we can’t just up and leave. The others will be worried about us and wondering what the hell happened.’

Cal’s face was full of mischief.

‘No they won’t. I told Con before we left that I was kidnapping you and taking off. He made a lewd comment that I won’t repeat, but he won’t be worried.’