Chasing Charlie (7 page)

SAM

From what I could see, Mara seemed pretty healthy. She was sipping slowly on one of her careful little halves of Guinness. She hadn't lost any weight. I looked at her tummy. Seemed the same size as usual. I remember when Mum's friend Chrissy was really sick with something – maybe cancer – her stomach became really bloated, like she was pregnant. It looked horrible. Unnatural on a fifty-something-year-old. But Mara's tum looked like it always did. Sturdy I'd describe it as, but not to her obviously. I returned to her face. Maybe she was paler than normal? But it was winter, and she was usually the colour of a freshly painted white wall anyway. Mara was listening very closely to Claudia talking quietly about her dad's gall bladder. It looked like her ears were operating as normal. I was probably worrying about nothing, I told myself, and drifted back to thinking about Charlie. Mara had other ideas.

‘Sam, have I got something on my face?' she said a little crossly.

‘No,' I replied.

‘You're staring at me.'

‘No I'm not,' I said, denying it out of habit. I really wasn't in the mood for getting into trouble with her again.

She held my gaze.

‘Maybe I was a little bit,' I conceded. I stammered on, ‘I-I was wondering if you're all right.'

‘I'm fine,' she said frostily, frowning at me.

‘Are you sure there's something you aren't telling us? Something to do with your health?'

‘Of course there isn't, I'm very healthy!' She shot a glance at Claudia, as if questioning my sanity.

‘Well, that's good then.' I looked at my hands. I wasn't getting very far here.

Then she softened her voice slightly, ‘Honestly, I'm fine. What made you ask?'

I caught Claudia giving me an encouraging smile so I braved meeting Mara's eyes again.

‘It's just that, well . . .' It was no use; I was floundering around like a tongue-tied teenager. I had never made much of a point of confronting Mara about her moods, generally because she was pretty constant. She was . . . well, she was just Mara most of the time. But it was pointless even going there with her. She was useless at talking about herself, bloody useless.

‘Spit it out, Sam.'

‘All right. Sheesh.' I took a deep breath. ‘It started when Ed came back. Before, in fact. You seemed a bit . . .' I tried to think of a kinder word but couldn't. ‘Uptight before Ed came back, and I thought you were worried about him, but now he's back . . . well, he seems all right to me but you're still jumpy,' I ended in a rush.

Mara looked at me with her hard stare, her flaring nostrils the only thing moving on her face. But she still didn't say anything.

I plunged on. ‘It, erm, got me thinking that maybe it's yourself you're worried about, rather than Ed. I mean, he's OK, maybe a bit lost, not sure what to do next, but he's in good shape, right?'

‘Good shape?' Mara asked and raised her eyebrows.

‘His mind,' I clarified. I looked from Mara to Claudia. Mara looked like she was steeling herself for something and Claudia was leaning forward a little, her eyes wide open, in an almost . . . expectant way. Strange. Oh my God. Surely not!

‘You don't think I like him, do you?' I almost shouted in disbelief. ‘You've got to be joking!'

Mara's eyebrows lowered slowly. I looked at Claudia but she didn't say anything, just sat back in her chair and hid behind her drink.

‘I mean, don't get me wrong, Mara, he's a great guy and everything . . .' I paused, giving Mara another chance to say something, any bloody thing. No wonder she was so tense! You'd have be Mother Bloody Teresa to be good enough for Mara's twin. But she was staring at her drink now, not saying a thing, not even looking like she was about to say anything. She looked all hard and disapproving and something else, something that looked a lot like fear . . . There was only one thing to do. It looked like I'd have to put all the cards on the table. Mara needed to know what was happening then she'd know for sure she had nothing to worry about.

‘Well, aside from him being your brother, Mara, I'm actually seeing someone.' This wasn't a proven fact yet, of course, but I was desperate.

‘You are?' Mara said. She looked shocked. Good. A good start. Definitely a step on from looking scared.

‘I am, and you won't approve!'

‘Go on.' Mara reached for her drink.

So I told her all about Charlie and rather than being painful, the conversation I had been dreading having with her actually turned out to be a rocking good time. OK, so it was only because, in comparison, the horror of me seducing Ed seemed like much the greater evil. It was so much fun talking about it that I threw myself head first into the telling, really playing up the role of the stupid girl who can't think straight when she's infatuated (I didn't have to pretend that bit, of course), tossing my hair about and everything. Mara listened to every word with just the odd exclamation of ‘Sam, you silly girl!' and ‘What a smarmy tosser!' and other pearls in gruff, disdainful tones, while her body language showed loud and clear what she was actually feeling – sweet fucking relief.

The evening took a distinct turn for the better after that. I was very glad not to be talking about Ed any longer. It started to turn into a relaxed Friday-night drink. It obviously wasn't going to be a big one. Claudia wasn't drinking (watching the calories apparently), Mara always drank modestly and I wasn't really in the mood for a big night. We were just getting to the yawning-let's-go-home-to-the-telly part of the evening when Mara, who had the best view of the pub, said, ‘What's he doing here?'

A moment later, standing next to our table in his signature Howies jacket, his faded olive-green satchel slung across his chest, was Ed.

‘Good question, what are you doing here, Ed?' I asked him.

‘You sure know how to make a girl feel welcome,' he said, sitting down.

‘You're a pretty funny-looking girl.'

‘Full of compliments, Sam, as usual.' He reached across the table and took Mara's drink.

‘Oi! That's mine. A drink being drunk by a girl because this is a girls' night out!'

‘Don't worry, sis. I'm going to a party, I only popped in to say a quick hello.'

‘Don't call me that!'

‘Thanks very much!' Ed raised Mara's glass at her and took another big glug.

I was shocked. I had never seen him act so arsey with Mara before. He was acting very strangely. Then it dawned on me that he looked like he'd had a few too many drinks.

‘Whose party is it?' asked Claudia.

‘I don't know,' Ed shrugged. He looked nonchalantly at each of us in turn. As his eyes met mine, I felt a tug at my belly. The awkwardness with Mara and my blustering explanation played out in frenetic fast forward in my mind. God, I wished he'd just piss off. I really didn't need him muddying things up. Why was he here anyway?

‘Sounds intriguing,' said Claudia.

‘Maybe.' He shrugged with more irritating nonchalance that seemed wrong coming from him. ‘It'll probably just be a bunch of boring City workers, knowing Rebecca.'

‘Rebecca?' I almost shouted again. ‘Are you feeling OK?'

Ed looked at me but didn't say a thing.

‘It's certainly not my idea of a good time,' I added crossly.

‘No, I've gathered that.'

‘What's that meant to mean?'

But before he could answer Mara butted in and asked Ed if Rebecca had been the one to invite him, and her voice was quiet and hard. The pub was bustling with noisy Friday drinkers all around them but there was no mistaking the seriousness of her tone.

Ed looked irritated.

‘Does it matter?' he said. When Mara didn't reply, he continued, ‘Chill out, Mars, it's only a night out. Just something to do, nothing more. I'm not going to go home with her, if that's what you're worried about.'

‘It's none of my business who you go home with,' Mara said primly.

Ed laughed and Mara's cheeks coloured with indignation.

I couldn't really believe what I was seeing. Ed was never this hard. I didn't like seeing him like this. It was a bit sad.

Thankfully Claudia managed to break the tension and pull Ed out of his mood a little by telling some tall tale she'd heard through the week. My phone buzzed in my pocket and I was grateful for the distraction. Discreetly, I took the phone out of my pocket and swiped the screen. Two unread messages!

 

Hope yr week's been better than mine. Haven't stopped. Enjoying beer o'clock. You?

 

And then:

 

Scrap that. Beer o'clock would be better with you. There's no one to argue with here.

 

I sniggered.

‘What?' Mara asked.

‘Nothing!' I replied.

She narrowed her eyes. Then she stood up and leant over the table between us.

‘You've got your phone out! Who do you need to be in touch with? We're all here!'

I shoved my phone back in my pocket and grinned. Mara could chastise me as much as she wanted. I didn't mind; I was flying high. He was thinking about me! About me!

‘Not everyone,' Ed said. ‘Your special someone isn't here, is he, Sam?'

‘Shut up, Ed,' I replied. I hadn't told him about Charlie and I wasn't about to now. Not when he was in such a grumpy mood.

Ed replied by draining Mara's drink and standing up. He picked up his satchel and swung it over his head, a rather insincere grin on his face that didn't suit him one little bit.

‘Well, that's me. Thanks for the drink, Mars. Have an enjoyable evening, ladies.'

I tried to think of a suitably cutting retort but couldn't think of anything, so I had to settle for glaring at him instead. He ignored me, blew a kiss to Mara and then winked at Claudia. Claudia gave him an amused smile back. I made a mental note to ask Claudia about it when he'd gone.

‘What the fuck are we going to do about that, “sis”?' I said, chucking my thumb over my shoulder, where Ed had disappeared into the throng at the bar. Mara gave me a tight smile and let out her breath, as if she'd been holding it for the duration.

‘Well, I'm going to get a round,' said Claudia, standing up.

‘Make it a lime and soda for me,' Mara said, ‘I want to go home soon.'

‘Me too.'

‘We're really pushing the boat out tonight, aren't we?' she replied and joined the crowd.

‘What the hell is going on, Mara?' I leant in towards her. Surely Mara would know what was going on with Ed. They've always seemed so close, had the kind of relationship I've always wished I'd had with a sister or brother growing up. They made the sibling thing look so effortless, so natural – nothing like the awkwardness between the little minx and me.

‘I don't know but I don't like it,' Mara answered and bit the side of her thumbnail thoughtfully. Suddenly her face cleared as she remembered something. ‘Rebecca came to our house during the week.'

‘You're joking.'

‘It was during the day, the day after she stayed the night – Monday, was it? Or Tuesday . . . Anyway she said to Ed she'd come to find her address book or something.'

‘I never saw any book.'

‘No, neither did I.'

That little tart. She'd come when we were at work and Ed would be home alone.

Claudia bustled back with the drinks. She set them all down and then busily distributed one to each of us. This was usually when she would take charge of the situation and chivvy us all into having a good time again. But she didn't look like she was about to say anything; in fact, I was sure she looked more like she was holding her thoughts in, keeping them to herself.

‘Claudia, you've been very quiet all evening, what do you make of Ed panting after that little snake in the grass?'

Claudia sat down and took a long sip of her water and looked at Mara and then me, as if she was turning her thoughts over in her head carefully before she opened her mouth.

‘Actually, I think it's the other way round,' she said, her eyes shining with amusement, or tiredness. It was hard to tell.

‘Rebecca's throwing herself at him?' I asked.

‘Something like that,' Claudia replied from behind her glass.

I turned it over in my mind. Yes, she was flirting with him the other night at our place. Yes, she's just broken up with James and is probably in need of some distraction. But Ed? Really? It didn't feel quite right, and I was sure Claudia was holding something back. There was something in her eyes, like she knew something we didn't. But first things first – we had to come up with some sort of plan to keep Rebecca away from our home. It was enough to endure being in the same room as my sister at family gatherings; I couldn't bear the thought of her impinging on my social life too.

Then my phone buzzed again. I took it out before I could think about it and had the message open in a flash.

It wasn't Charlie – it was Ed!

 

Stop looking at your phone. It's girls' night.

 

I snorted.

‘Your Casanova again?' Mara asked wearily.

I was giggling so much I couldn't get my words out.

‘It's—' I met Mara's eye. And with a flash of inspiration I answered, ‘It's Rebecca. Wondering if we've seen Ed.'

After all, half an hour ago Mara still thought I was after her brother. She can't know he'd just texted me and made me laugh, no way.

‘Told you!' Claudia said.

Mara shook her head and half laughed with the shock.

‘This is all your fault, Sam, she's your sister.'

‘Sorry. I'd send her back if I could.'

‘She would too,' Claudia laughed.

‘There's only one thing for it,' Mara continued. ‘As soon as Ed's got some work, he can move out. At least that way if they do become . . . friends,' she said the word delicately, as if trying it out in a strange language for the first time, ‘we won't have to be involved. He's planning to do that anyway. I wasn't really looking forward to him leaving but I'm quickly changing my mind.'