Fighting Strong (7 page)

“My bruises and burns and stitches… I took photos of them all. And when I looked at them later, I saw them as far away from me. I switched over to black-and-white film around then, and that made the pictures even
less
emotional, somehow. Like – almost a documentary about someone who had nothing whatsoever to do with me.”

He was very still.

She looked at Adam. “I guess it’s hard to explain.”

“No. No, I get it. You were figuring out how to distance yourself from what was happening to you. Trying to take back some control in a situation where you were totally helpless.”

“Yeah, I think so. But the problem is that I started treating
every
part of my life like this. I – I’ve used my camera as a shield for over twenty years and I’ve stayed hidden behind it, observing my whole world through a tiny lens and in black-and-white.” She shrugged. “I mean, I have a good eye and I can capture an image in a split-second, but I rarely feel any attachment to my photos. I use them to be apart from my subjects; I don’t connect to anyone or anything through them.”

“You don’t feel any emotional connection to anything or anyone that you photograph?”

“Very rarely. For me, they’re just – pictures.”

“And your appearance also creates distance from people, right?”

“You mean my clothes and makeup and stuff?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, for sure. It’s all about keeping people at arm’s length. It’s – it’s safer for me that way.”

Adam was quiet as he saw what was approaching in the distance.

“Adam? Is something wrong?”

“There it is.” Adam nodded. “We’re here, baby.”

She raised her chin as she watched the sign marking the Nevada state line getting closer. “Some things are better kept at a distance.”

Adam clutched her hand as they passed the sign. “And some things should be kept as close as possible.”

Katie glanced at him, saw his worry. She smiled and squeezed his hand.

“Yeah. And the good thing is that it’s usually pretty easy to tell which is which.” She took a deep breath. “I understand that now.”

**

Mia wandered out of the office when she smelled food.

“Hey,” she said. “Did you cook?”

Nick turned. “I did. Nothing fancy… just pasta and salad. Is that OK?”

“Are you kidding me? It sounds perfect.”

“OK, then. Pour yourself a glass of wine and go sit down.”

Mia sat at the table and watched him in the kitchen. He brought the food to the table and sat across from her, his gray eyes very dark in the candlelight.

“Thanks,” she said. “I don’t know how the whole day just got away from me like that.”

“So the writing is going well?”

“Yeah, actually. Really well.”

“Tell me.”

They talked as they ate, their conversation easy and relaxed. Nick watched her face as she told him about her book, and he couldn’t think when she had last looked so animated and content.

Mia saw him looking at her. “What?”

He shrugged, a smile on his handsome face. “Nothing. Just happy to see you so happy.”

“I
am
happy,” she said. “Thank you so much for bringing me here… it’s perfect and you were right. It was what I needed.”

“Me too.”

Their eyes met and instantly, the heat flared between them. Nick hardened and Mia moistened and they both knew exactly what was happening with the other.

“So,” Nick said. “What do you say we have dessert in the bedroom?”

“Sounds good,” Mia said. “What
is
dessert, anyway?”

He stood up. “You’ll see when we get there.”

**

Adam pulled in to the hotel parking lot. He looked at Katie, still worried about her.

“We’re here.”

She nodded and started to open her door.

“Hey, stay there. I’ll come get you.”

He helped her out of the car, his arm wrapped around her waist. She gasped as her balance wavered and he held her tighter.

“OK?” he said.

“Yeah,” she said.

“Let’s go check in.” Adam slammed the door.

“Just – hold on a second,” she said.

He paused.

Katie looked down and swallowed hard. He saw that she looked anxious.

“What’s wrong?” he said. “Are you OK?”

“I – I want to ask you something.”

“Sure.”

She stood there, trying to work up the courage to say what she wanted. Years of not asking for anything from anyone were working against her, and she was mute in his arms.

“Katie?”

“I’m – I’m bad at this, Adam. I’m bad at asking for – for help.” She looked up in to those eyes. “I’m bad at asking for what I need when it means that I look weak.”

He stroked her hair. “I’m not surprised. You spent a long time taking care of yourself. Asking someone else to take care of you must feel strange.” His hand rested lightly against her throat. “But you can ask me for anything, Katie, and I’ll do it.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Ask.”

“OK. Ummm. I know we agreed to take things slow, but I’d like to ask if we can – we can share a room tonight. Share a bed.”

Adam stared down at her as she stood there blushing and shifting from foot to foot. His stomach dropped about five feet and his heart raced. He wanted nothing more than to spend the night holding her.

He lifted her chin, forced her to look at him. “Are you sure, baby?”

She nodded. “I’m worried about nightmares. The closer we get to – to him, the more things are coming back to me. Things I’d forgotten or pushed far down.” Her eyes were tearing up. “I’m scared, Adam. Can you be there if I wake up?”

He smiled. “Yes.”

She heaved a sigh of relief and he felt her tremble. “Thank you.”

He wanted to kiss her right then, but he didn’t. He wondered just how the hell he was going to stop himself from kissing her as they lay in bed together, their bodies pressed up against each other. And if he
did
kiss her and she
did
respond, how was he going to stop himself from doing more?

OK, man. This is not about you; this is about what
she
needs. Cool it.

“You’re welcome. I’m glad you asked.”

“Me too.”

“OK.” He cleared his throat. “You hungry?”

“Actually, yes.”

“Let’s check in, drop off our bags and go get some dinner. What do you say?”

“I say that sounds good.”

**

A few hours later, Katie wiped her hand over the mirror, clearing the fog away. The bathroom was steamy and warm and it was making her drowsy again. She blinked hard and tried to focus.

She heard Adam moving around in the bedroom outside the door. It sounded like he was unpacking a bit, maybe turning down the bed.

The bed.

Even though they had, technically, slept together on the same sleeping bag and under the same blankets the night before, something about sharing a bed felt – different. More official, more blatant. They weren’t like innocent kids on a sleepover or at summer camp, not anymore. This felt adult and totally acknowledged.

She stared at herself, wondering what the night was going to bring. She didn’t feel anywhere near ready for sex, but her body did want something.

How far do you want to go, Katie? And how far is Adam willing to go with you?

She tugged his massive t-shirt down around her thighs and took a deep breath.

Adam heard the bathroom door open and he turned.

“Well,” he said. “Look at you in a white t-shirt.” He grinned. “You look great in a color other than black, you know.”

“You think?”

“Hell, yeah.”

They gazed at each other.

“You ready for bed?” he said.

Katie nodded.

“Come on, then.” He climbed in and patted the mattress next to him. “Come here.”

She walked over slowly, sat on the edge of the bed. She looked at him.

Adam was lying there in a t-shirt and boxer shorts. His face was open and gentle, his eyes warm. She smiled.

He reached out and touched her hand, his thumb drawing tiny circles on her palm. “Whatever you want to do, Katie.”

“I want to… to lie down.”

He held out his arms and she nestled on to his chest. His arms went around her and she sighed as his hands ran up and down her back. He kissed the top of her head and she relaxed.

He’s not going to force anything. You know that. You know
him
.

She raised her head and looked up at him. Delicately, she traced his cheekbones, moved down to his chin, touched the curve of his mouth. He stayed totally still, those amazing blue eyes watching her face.

Katie’s heart was beating faster now, her body warming up. She lifted herself up on his chest and he pulled her closer. She felt his heat on every inch of her, felt his hot breath on her face. She paused, noticing that she wasn’t tense or anxious, not at all. Then she kissed him.

His lips were surprisingly soft and gentle. He let her take the lead, let her increase the pressure. She touched his face, pulling him closer and he went willingly. When her mouth opened, he touched her lips with his tongue, carefully, and when she gave a low moan, he stroked her mouth again, more strongly. She gasped and her fingers curled around his t-shirt.

Adam pulled back for a second, looked in to her eyes. They were hazy and sweet and he kissed her again and again, letting the passion build between them. She tasted like peppermint and smelled like roses and he wanted to just sink in to her, like a hot bath.

Katie ran her fingers over his chest, loving the hard muscle there. She had seen Adam’s chest, of course, when she had photographed him, and she knew every inch of it. Touching it, though, was a whole different experience. She reached for his t-shirt and lifted it up his body. He shifted on his back, helping her. She pulled it over his head and propped herself up on her elbow, just looking at his naked upper body.

Adam closed his eyes as her slim hand ran over his shoulders, his collarbone, his pecs, down his stomach. Her fingers traced his forearms and biceps, skimming over his tattoos.

“I like your tattoos,” she said. “How many do you have?”

He opened his eyes. “Twenty-two.” His voice was hoarse.

She lowered her head and kissed his chest, running her tongue over his skin. She followed the lines of the tattoos, tracing the curves and shapes. His cock hardened and he clenched his hands, fighting to not flip her over and grind her in to the bed. Her mouth and fingers fluttered like butterfly wings and Adam thought he’d never felt anything so perfect in his whole life.

Suddenly, Katie sat up, pulling away from him.

“You OK?’ he asked. “You want to stop?”

She gazed down at him, saw the worry in his eyes. “I’m fine, Adam.” She crossed her arms in front of her body and lifted the t-shirt up and over her head.

Adam’s eyes darkened with lust as her perfect breasts appeared. He imagined tasting them and he licked his lips. He sat up too and she moved on to his lap; she sat on his thighs and wrapped her legs around his hips.

“Is your leg OK like this?” he said.

She nodded. “Yes.”

Her naked breasts pressed against him and he groaned and ran his hands up and down her back, pulling her to him. She gasped at that first touch of his mouth on her skin. She arched a bit, her hands in his hair, lifting her breasts. Adam kissed her nipples, licking the hard peaks before gently sucking on them. He moved back and forth slowly, teasing and tonguing her, hearing her breath speed up as his rough, unshaven cheeks tantalized her softness.

Katie clutched him closer as the sensations tumbled through her body. Her stomach tightened and her pussy opened as her desire surged. She felt his arousal under her and pressed against it. He felt her heat even through their underwear and he growled deep in his throat.

“Careful, baby,” he said.

“Why?” she asked.

“Because I don’t want to go too fast.” He took a deep breath. “I don’t want to scare you.”

She nodded. “I’m not – not ready for much more. I don’t want to take anything else off.” She hesitated. “Is that OK with you?”

He saw her uncertainty and he gave her a lingering kiss. “Yeah. We can stop here.”

“You sure? You don’t think I’m – I’m teasing you?”

“No.”

She felt a wave of relief. “OK.”

“I can make you feel good without taking off any more clothing, Katie.” His eyes were hot.

“What do you mean?”

“Do you trust me?”

“Yes.”

“Then move on me… just move so that it feels good.”

She stared down at him. “With – with my underwear?”

“Yeah.” He pushed against her slightly, lifting her body off the bed, and she gasped as her pussy opened wider. The tip of his cock touched her lower lips, pressed against her clit. She stiffened as a small shock of pleasure shook her.

“Oh,” she said. “Oh, God.”

“Is that OK?” he asked.

“Oh… yes.”

He pulled her face down to his, kissing her deeply. Without any conscious thought, her hips began to roll and undulate, her hands clutching his shoulders. She rocked back and forth, stroking the length of her hot center on him, over and over. Her bud hardened and swelled, and she rubbed it against his cock, experimenting until she found the angle and place that felt the best.

Adam could feel her wetness even through his boxers and he loved knowing that he was doing this to her. As her body writhed on top of his, he held her ass, helping her to lift and lower herself faster. Her body moved on him with increasingly more frantic movements, and she closed her eyes as the pleasure grew.

Her whole body felt like a live wire: taut and stretched and sparking with electricity. The jolts started in her clit and spread out, travelled through her body, all the way to her fingertips. They got more frequent and intense and her eyes widened as she realized what was happening.

Oh, my God. I’m coming. I’m actually coming.

“Adam,” she breathed. “Adam, oh,
God
.”

“I’ve got you, baby. Just enjoy it… just let it happen.”

She threw her head back and gave a loud cry of surprise and ecstasy. Adam watched her face as she came, his own arousal almost unbearable. She shook above him, sobbing and saying his name, then she fell forward, her forehead on his broad shoulder. She shuddered one last time and went still.