Long Time Coming (10 page)

Jamal ran to the bathroom, tore some tissue off the roll, and ran back to his mother. He tore the tissue in half and wiped Kenisha's face with one half and handed the other half of the tissue to her and said, "Here, blow your nose."

Kenisha took the tissue and blew her nose. She sat up."You take such good care of your mama. I couldn't have asked for a better son."

W
hen Deidre hung up the phone, she pushed the intercom and then asked the school secretary, "Can you cancel my appointment with Dr. Thomas? I need to take care of something, and I'm not sure how long I'll be gone." She stood up, grabbed her coat and car keys, and left the building.

She wasn't sure why, but she felt connected to this family. The sound of Jamal's sorrowful voice had almost broken her heart. She wanted to do whatever she could to help him.

Deidre wasn't sure what had happened to cause Kenisha's depression, but she knew for sure that Kenisha had definitely spiraled into a depression, because she had been there herself. All these years of not being able to conceive a child and not being able to tell Johnson the awful truth had caused Deidre so much pain, that even knowing Jesus hadn't stopped her from spiraling into the grips of depression every now and then.

Deidre's deep depressions had caused her to wonder if she had truly given her life to Christ when she'd uttered the sinner's prayer, or if she had just been saying words that meant nothing and went nowhere? But then she would remind herself of the biblical heroes in the Old Testament, like Elijah. The prophet Elijah was almost supernatural in his zeal for the things of God, but this same man fled to Mount Horeb, sat under a juniper tree, and asked God to let him die. For Deidre, the most memorable part of that story was found in 1 Kings 19:7: "
And the angel of the LORD came again the second time, and touched him, and said, Arise and eat; because the journey is too great for thee."

Deidre had certainly learned that some of life's journeys were simply too great for her, and she needed to lean on the Lord to get through them. Just as God had sent an angel to strengthen Elijah, Deidre knew that Johnson had been her angel, sent from heaven above. He had helped her move past the pain, and now she wanted to do the same for Kenisha. So she prayed for God's healing power to touch Kenisha and end her depression.

When Deidre arrived at Kenisha's apartment, she jumped out of her car and rushed to the door. She knocked and then turned the knob, hoping that the door would open. It was locked, so she knocked again, or rather, she pounded on the door this time."Jamal, it's me."

The door swung open and Kenisha was standing there holding a bunch of soggy tissue in her hand."The way you were banging on my door, I thought you were the police."

Kenisha looked disheveled, with her hair standing on top of her head. She smelled as if she hadn't seen a shower in days, but Deidre didn't say a word about her appearance."I was worried about you," Deidre said as she walked into the apartment."Jamal sounded frantic when he called the school."

"Oh, don't worry. Jamal will be back in school tomorrow. I already let him know that he can't stay here with me."

"That's not why I'm here, Kenisha. I was really concerned about you." She pointed at the wet tissue in Kenisha's hand."Jamal said that you couldn't stop crying. What's going on?"

"Trust me," Kenisha said, "you don't even want to know my horror story."

"Jamal also said that you hadn't been out of your bed in several days."

Kenisha lifted her arms and twirled around before plopping down on the couch in the living room."I'm out of bed now. So you can go on back to work. Don't worry, I'm not going to neglect my children."

"Why do you act so defensive all the time?" Deidre asked.

"How am I supposed to act? You did threaten to call Children's Services on me. And now you want to keep coming over here acting like you're concerned. But how do I know that you're not just trying to build a case against me with the truant officer?"

"Mrs. Morris isn't here because I skipped school today, Mama. I called her and asked her to come," Jamal interjected.

"Why didn't you tell me that you called her?" Kenisha asked.

"I called Auntie Aisha first, but she was tired from being up all night. So I called Mrs. Morris and asked if she would come help you." He hunched his shoulders and then added, "Nothing I was doing seemed to work."

"Jamal, I'm sorry I scared you, but you can't go calling everybody in the world, telling them our business. Some things are best left in your own home. Okay?"

Jamal looked down at his feet as he said, "Okay, Mama, but you're not acting like yourself. You need help."

"Talk to me, Kenisha. What's wrong?" Deidre tried again as she took a seat on the chair next to the couch.

Kenisha looked at Deidre for a moment, shook her head in frustration, and then stood up. She turned to Jamal and said, "Fix yourself some lunch. I'm going to sit outside for a minute and talk to Mrs. Deidre."

Jamal nodded and went to the kitchen.

Kenisha put on a pair of house shoes and then opened the front door and walked out.

Deidre got up and followed her out. She unlocked her car doors, and she and Kenisha sat down in the front seats.

"Talk to me, Kenisha. Is there anything I can do to help?" Deidre had dealt with numerous parents in her years as a teacher and principal. Once in a great while she ran into a mother who made her want to reach out and help. Kenisha was such a mother. Deidre saw so much potential in this young woman. Kenisha might be a young mother with too many kids and too many baby daddies, but she really cared about her children. And because of that, Deidre found herself wanting the best for all of them.

"The cancer has spread," Kenisha said matter-of-factly.

A look of shock and dread crossed Deidre's face before she could pull it back."What do you mean, the cancer has spread? They operated on you, and you did the chemo."

"Same thing I've been saying ever since I got the news. But to be truthful, Dr. Lawson didn't make any promises to me. He said all along that the surgery might not work because of the late detection." Kenisha leaned back on the headrest and exhaled."What I don't understand is how I was supposed to know that I needed to get checked out. I'm only twenty-three. People my age don't get cancer. Right?"

"That's what I would have thought. I'm so sorry, Kenisha."

"Me too. Dr. Lawson thinks I have less than six more months left to live." Kenisha shook her head."If I make it the full six months, I'll be twenty-four, but that's still too young to die."

Deidre was speechless. She'd driven over here thinking that Kenisha's mother had hurt herself or that the chemotherapy was affecting her, but never in her wildest imagination had she thought that Kenisha was dying. It was just as Kenisha had said—she was too young to die.

"You're awfully quiet for someone who wanted to talk," Kenisha said with a smirk on her face.

"To tell you the truth, I don't know what to say."

Kenisha must not have known what to say either, because the car became deathly silent. Then something came to Deidre. In truth, Deidre didn't know why she hadn't thought of this first. She turned to Kenisha and asked, "Have you prayed?"

Scoffing at the thought, Kenisha said, "I gave up on that when Dr. Lawson told me that I had cancer. If God wanted to help me, He could have just made sure none of this happened to me, but He didn't. So you can save the prayer for the next sucker."

But Deidre wasn't going to let it end like that. She felt bad that she had been too wrapped up in her own misery to offer prayer the first day Kenisha had told her about the cancer. But Deidre firmly believed that being late was better than never showing up at all, so she said, "Prayer works, Kenisha. I've seen lives changed through prayer."

Kenisha turned cold, unyielding eyes on Deidre."Yeah? Well, tell that to my children when I'm dead." She opened the car door and got out.

Deidre rolled her window down."Wait, Kenisha, don't leave. I want to help you."

Waving goodbye, Kenisha said, "Sorry, Deidre, I don't have time to pray. I need to clean my house and fix dinner for my children. But don't worry. I promise that Jamal will be in school tomorrow."

"Okay. Well then, I'll come back over here on my lunch break tomorrow so we can talk." Deidre rolled up her window as Kenisha walked back into her apartment.

Driving down the street, tears streamed down Deidre's face as she kept picturing Kenisha waving goodbye to her."How could that young girl be dying?"

Her heart ached for Kenisha and the children. She couldn't imagine how it would be to bring children into the world and find out that she would not be able to raise them to adulthood. That would be almost as bad as never being able to have children. Deidre smashed her hand against the steering wheel as anger gripped her so tightly that she needed to lash out at somebody or something.

When she got back to work, Christina handed her a note from Dr. Thomas."He seemed upset, so I would call him right away."

"Okay, thanks," Deidre said, dreading picking up the phone to call Dr. Thomas. He was never pleasant to her, but now she had ticked him off by canceling their meeting. She dialed the phone anyway. When Dr. Thomas was on the line, Deidre said, "Sorry about missing our meeting. Something urgent came up."

"I just bet it did," Dr. Thomas said."But your little stunt of running out of the office today isn't going to help you."

With a look of confusion on her face, Deidre asked, "Did I do something wrong, Dr. Thomas?"

"You tell me. Shameka Nickels filed a complaint against you. She says that you have singled her son out, and that you have suspended him numerous times for small infractions that other kids would have just received detention for."

"That is simply not true. I have tried to work with that woman. But she doesn't seem to care that her son terrorizes the kids in his class. My teachers can't perform if they constantly have to stop what they are doing to discipline Ronny Nickels."

"Well, I will be conducting a full investigation, and if it appears that you have singled this boy out, you'll be looking for a new assignment."

Did this man just threaten to fire her? Deidre didn't know how much more of Dr. Thomas she was going to be able to tolerate. The man never gave her the benefit of the doubt on anything. But she wasn't about to stand idly by and lose her job over false allegations."I welcome your investigation, Dr. Thomas. Maybe once you're finished reviewing our files and talking with Ronny's teachers, you can give me a little guidance. Because Ronny is a very bright kid, with a good future ahead of him, if he gets steered in the right direction."

"I'll look at everything and let you know what I find," Dr. Thomas said before hanging up the phone.

For the rest of the day, Deidre tried her best to forget about Shameka Nickels, but she felt so bad for Ronny that she couldn't get him off her mind. And then, every time she thought about Ronny living with that awful mother of his, her thoughts strayed over to Jamal, and she feared for his future—a future without his mother.

That night when Deidre went home she told Johnson about the horrible day she'd had—about Kenisha's doctor telling her she had six months to live and about her suspicions that Ronny Nickels would end up serving a life sentence in prison. Then she asked if he would pray with her.

"Let's do this," was all Johnson said before he and Deidre bombarded heaven on behalf of Kenisha and her children. When they were finished praying for Kenisha and her children, Deidre and Johnson then bombarded heaven on behalf of Ronny Nickels.

T
rue to her word, Deidre went back over to Kenisha's house on her lunch break the next day. She knew that Jamal was at school because she had seen him. Deidre just hoped that Kennedy and Diamond were out of the house as well. She had the feeling that Kenisha hadn't told them anything yet, so she didn't want anything to hinder their conversation.

When Kenisha opened her front door, Deidre noted with pleasure that Kenisha had combed her hair and located the shower. She was dressed neatly and appeared to be in better spirits."Don't tell
me
that prayer doesn't work," Deidre said as she walked into Kenisha's place and sat down."I prayed for you all night, and look at you. You're practically radiant."

"I don't know if prayer had anything to do with it. I was just tired of letting my kids wander around like lost pups. So I knew I had to pull myself together." Plopping down on the couch beside Deidre, Kenisha added, "I'm not dead yet."

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about." Deidre turned to face Kenisha."Johnson and I prayed for your healing last night, but then it came to me that you need to participate in this also." Deidre grabbed Kenisha's hands."I want to pray with you, okay?"

Kenisha appeared to give the suggestion some thought, but in the next moment, she slid her hands away from Deidre."You can believe what you want, Deidre. But as far as I'm concerned, prayer just gives people false hope. And I have finally come to terms with the fact that I'm dying, so if it's all the same to you, I'd rather not go backward. I need to move forward and figure out what I'm going to do with my children."

Deidre wanted to dispute Kenisha's comment about prayer providing false hope, but a slight nudging in her spirit let her know that this was not the time. So she simply met her where she currently resided."Okay, so let's say that if all else fails and you do . . . die"—she hesitated, not wanting to say that word—"is there anyone in your family who would be willing to adopt your children?"

"I wouldn't want any of them to raise my children. And if I even thought they'd get them after I die, I'd probably put them all in a room and kill 'em. And then I'd stand trial, knowing that I wouldn't live to serve my time."

"If I didn't think you were joking, I'd have to call the police right now."

Kenisha rolled her eyes."Okay, I might not kill them. But my kids can't live with those people. They deserve better than that."

"Do you have a will?"

Stretching her arms out indicating the items in the living room, Kenisha sarcastically said, "Yeah, I have so many valuables that I meet with my attorney every year to update my will, right after I meet with my financial advisor."

"You don't have to be a smart aleck, young lady. I'm just trying to tell you that if you have specific wishes for your children, it's best to have it written out and notarized."

"Okay, then, I'll make sure to write down my wishes."

"It's not enough to just say what you don't want, Kenisha. We need to determine who might be a good fit for your children. So let's at least start by compiling a list of your immediate family members."

"Well, that will be quick, because I'm going to reject them all."

"You can't just dismiss them so quickly, Kenisha. What about your mother? You really don't think she would step up to the plate and take care of your children if something happened to you?"

"My mother is a drunk. And besides that, she never protected her own children, so how can I expect her to protect mine?"

"Okay, I understand why you don't want your mother. But what about Aisha?"

"Aisha is lazy. She has four illiterate children, and two of them are over the age of seven. No way will Aisha destroy my children's future the way she's doing with her own children. And before you ask, Kevin is a wonderful guy, but he is addicted to drugs and therefore is not stable enough to keep my children."

Deidre felt so sorry for Kenisha, but she tried her best not to let it show. If she knew nothing about the young woman in front of her, she knew that Kenisha couldn't stand to be pitied or looked down upon."What about your father? Do you have any communications with him?"

Kenisha scoffed."I don't know if I can call the man who impregnated Martha a father. I know he paid his child support. But he never visited me when I was a kid."

"Did he and your mother not get along?"

"All I know is the man's name is Dwayne Smalls. He owns a chain of fast-food restaurants and has children littered all over this city. But the only ones he claims outright are the ones he had with his wife."

"You've never seen him?" Deidre had been daddy's little girl until the day her father died of a massive heart attack. She remembered crying as if the world had come to an end when her daddy died. But Kenisha spoke of her father with no emotion at all. Deidre just couldn't fathom how her life would have been had she grown up without the love of her father.

"I went to one of his restaurants a few years back." Kenisha's eyes took on a faraway look as if she was picturing the scene all over again."I dressed my children in their nicest clothes, and we ordered our food and sat down at one of the tables and waited for him to come in. We had been finished with our food for over an hour when he finally walked in the door. He had some files with him, so he walked over to one of the tables and sat down.

"I got up and walked over to him. I put my hand out and said, 'Sir, my name is Kenisha, and I brought my children here today so they could meet you. '

"He ignored my hand as he looked up at me and said, 'If it's money you want, you need to ask your mama for it. I paid my child support, and if she didn't give it to you, I don't have anything to do with that. ' "

"That's pretty cold," was all Deidre could say.

"Don't I know it. So, anyway, that was the first and the last time I saw the man."

"But he gave you his last name."

"My mom blackmailed him into doing that. I was child number three, and she was tired of not being able to list the name of the father on her children's birth certificates. So she promised not to tell his wife if he would give me his last name and sign the birth certificate."

Things were looking pretty bleak as far as family members went, but then Deidre remembered something and snapped her finger."Don't you have another sister? The one who kept your children while you were in the hospital."

Kenisha smiled."Angelina is smart. That girl is going places. And as much as I hate to agree with my mother, she doesn't need three kids stopping her from achieving her goals." A look of determination overtook Kenisha as she said."I wouldn't want her to have my children, anyway."

"Why not? You just said she's going places."

"Angelina isn't the problem. It's her father. He's a pervert, and that man will never get his hands on my children. He's ruined enough children in my family."

Again, sadness overtook Deidre at the thought of the life Kenisha must have led, but she didn't pity Kenisha. Rather, she admired the strength in this girl who grew up too soon and, if the doctors were right, would be gone from this earth way too soon. Deidre remembered watching the Michael Jackson memorial and listening as Usher sang "Gone Too Soon." The song was endearing, and it had touched a special place in Deidre's heart. But she hadn't known Michael Jackson. She knew Kenisha, and as she thought of that song while they sat on the couch, discussing possible options in the case of her death, Deidre couldn't hold back any longer, and a tear fell down her cheek, followed by several others.

"I'm sorry," Deidre said, knowing that Kenisha wouldn't want to see her tears.

"I'm sorry too. I wish I had a different family. I wish my mother had never run into Jimmy, the child molester, and I wish I didn't have cancer. But there's no sense wishing the day away when I need help finding a family for my children."

At that moment, Deidre flashed back to her conversations with Johnson about adopting. And then she realized that God did, indeed, work in mysterious ways. Because while she was thinking that Johnson's sudden interest in adopting a child showed a lack of faith in her ability to conceive a child for them, it had been God planting a seed all along. She and Johnson must have had that conversation so that when this moment occurred with Kenisha, Deidre would know exactly what to say. Her eyes lit up as she asked, "Have you thought about checking out some adoption agencies?"

"I don't know," Kenisha said hesitantly."What if the father is a pervert or the mother is a drunk?"

"These agencies screen the prospective parents pretty thoroughly."

"How do you know?" Kenisha folded her arms across her chest.

"Johnson and I have applied with the Action Adoption agency, and they are running thorough background checks on us. If you'd like, I can do a little more research on the process."

Kenisha unfolded her arms."You'd do that for me?"

"Of course. All I have to do is Google a few things and then make a few calls. Once I have the information, we can decide what we want to do."

Kenisha looked away as she said, "I'd appreciate it if you'd look that information up for me. I don't have a computer, so I'd have to go to the library to do it, and right now, I don't think I'm suitable company for the general public."

Deidre looked at her watch and then stood up."It's way past my lunchtime, so I need to get back to work."

"Good thing you don't have classes to teach, or you'd probably have to fire yourself, huh?" Kenisha said with a laugh as she followed Deidre to the door.

"I might not have classes, but I have a superintendent who could give me the boot. But I'm not trying to give him a reason."

"Thanks for stopping by," Kenisha said as she opened the door.

This was the first time Kenisha had ever thanked her for anything. Kenisha had been so defensive about everything from the moment they'd met that Deidre never knew what might set the girl off. But now it seemed as if Kenisha was letting her guard down a bit. That made Deidre feel good. She had misjudged Kenisha when they had first met, and ever since that time she had been trying to make things right. It appeared that she and Kenisha were rounding a new corner, and maybe they were even becoming friends.

"I'll talk to you in a couple of days, once I have some more information on what you need to do." Deidre was all smiles as she left Kenisha's house.

When she got to her car, though, the tears began to fall. Deidre drove down the street and then parked her car. She was so shaken up by the whole thing. No one should have to deal with so much misery in such a short span of time. She wanted to help Kenisha but felt that anything she could do would certainly not make up for the lifetime of suffering this young girl had endured.

Deidre picked up her cell phone and dialed her mother.

The phone rang three times, and then Loretta Clark picked up."Hey, sweetie, it's so nice to hear from you."

Deidre couldn't stop the tears from flowing as she opened her mouth and blurted out, "Mom, I just want to thank you for being a good mother. You've always looked out for me, and I appreciate it."

"Are you crying?" Loretta asked with concern in her voice.

"Yes."

"Why, honey. What's wrong?"

Deidre wiped the tears from her face and then said, "I have a new friend. Her name is Kenisha."

"Well, that's nothing to cry about," Loretta said, sounding a little baffled.

"She's dying, Mom. She's only twenty-three years old, she has three kids, and she's dying."

"I'm so sorry to hear that, honey."

"Would you pray for her, Mom?"

"Yes, of course I will. Now dry your eyes and trust God— okay, Deidre?"

"All right, Mom. I'll do that."

Deidre had researched adoption agencies. And she had found out how the process would work for her and Johnson, but she didn't know much about what Kenisha would need to do in order to have her children adopted. So she sat back down in front of her computer and began her research. She printed off dozens of pages and jotted down a bunch of notes on her notepad. The entire process seemed pretty straightforward. To get the process started, Kenisha would have to appear before the probate court and relinquish her rights so the adoptive family could petition the court for a decree of adoption. The probate court would have to approve both Kenisha's application and the adoptive parents' petition before a decree of adoption could be ordered by the court.

When she was done, she called Kenisha."Hey, I've got that information we talked about," Deidre said as soon as Kenisha picked up the phone.

"That quick?"

"The Internet is a wonderful thing."

"So what do we do now?"

"In order to have the children adopted, you'll need to apply with the probate court. Before doing that, I would suggest having someone in mind, so the courts don't pick someone for you."

"I wouldn't want the courts to pick my children's parents," Kenisha said in a whisper.

"Are the kids in the room with you?" Deidre asked.

"I'm in the kitchen, but they're in the living room watching a movie, so I don't want to talk too loud."