Never Let Me Go: Part 2 (7 page)

“God. Grace, you always surprise me.” He tipped my chin up and kissed me.

We raced through the lobby after leaping from the car. The elevator felt like it took an eternity to get to the bottom floor.

He pressed my back against the cold metal wall and slid his hand up my thigh. His eyes widened when he got to my surprise.

“Shit.” He knelt down to examine me closer.

My insides turned to molten honey. I felt wanton, sexy. Knowing I made him react like this.

“You like?” I licked my lower lip.

He narrowed his eyes and got to his feet again. He pressed me against the wall again, his leg pushing my thighs apart. I stifled a moan when I felt his teeth sink into the top part of my shoulder.

The ding of the elevator reaching our floor was the only thing that could have made me leave.

“Come on, I need to see what other surprises you have for me,” he growled and dragged me along behind him.

FUCK. GRACE WAS SEXY AS
hell as she sauntered into our room ahead of me. Her hips swaying, the tight skirt of her dress riding higher on her thighs.

“What do you have for me, Kitten.” I sat on the edge of the bed.

“So much.” She looked me in the eye and pulled her dress over her head.

I sucked in a breath when I saw what she had on. Black satin. Black fucking satin and sky high heels.

“Do you know what you’re doing to me?” I trailed a finger over the exposed skin of her chest.

“Tell me,” she whispered.

I grinned and took my suit jacket off, letting it fall to the floor. “First, you make it hard not to have my hands on you. Looking like that, it’s all I can do not to throw you on the bed and spend the next three hours making you scream my name. You make me want to be rough, to take what I want.”

“What’s stopping you?” She put a knee on the bed and bent over.

I choked out a breath and came up behind her, running my hands from her thighs to her stomach.

“Is that how you want it, Kitten? You want me to have my way with you? You want me to take what I want?” I demanded.

“Yes. That’s what I want,” she sighed.

“Your wish is my command, baby. Up on the bed. Leave the heels on.”

I made her watch as I slowly unbuttoned my shirt and put it on the dresser. My pants came next, her hungry eyes following their progress as they fell to the floor.

“Can you see the affect you have on me?” I growled.

She nodded, biting her lower lip.

I pounced on her. Grabbing and touching anything I could get my hands on. She moaned under me.

“Kitten,” I sighed into her ear as I slipped inside. “Always so perfect. Mine. Only mine.” All thoughts of being rough went out the window when I saw the look of pure love in her eyes.

“Always yours, Logan.” She breathed as she wrapped her legs around my waist.

It was too good, being with her, a part of her, it was too amazing. She felt too good. I reached and put my hands under her, wanting to feel every bit of her.

“God Logan, it’s so good.” She closed her eyes, lost to her own desire.

“Come on, Kitten, a little more for me,” I urged her.

She squeezed her eyes shut, and shook her head. I could already feel her squeezing me. That was all it took; I crushed my mouth on hers and gave her everything I had in me.

“I always think I’ve imagined how good it is with you,” she sighed.

I laughed and rolled to the side, both of us panting and sweaty.

“And?” I turned my head to look at her.

“You surprise me every time.” The satisfied smile she wore spoke volumes. “You make me feel so many things I thought I wasn’t capable of Logan.” She tried to roll away but I held her in place.

“Tell me.” I could see how at war her emotions were.

“This isn’t really a post sex talk.”

“Does it matter? I want to know you Grace. All of you.”

“For me, sexy isn’t something I ever thought I was. Scott never liked me in lingerie, he always told me I didn’t have the body for it.” She twisted the sheet in her hands.

My hands curled into fists. I felt a rage I had never experienced before. First, that the bastard had ever had the good fortune to see her naked to begin with. And second, that he told her she wasn’t good enough.

“Grace. Look at me please.”

A slight shake of her head told me just how much he had messed her up.

“Look at me. I need to see your eyes.” I took her chin in my hands. “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid my eyes on. In nothing, in lingerie, in my shirts. It doesn’t matter what you wear or don’t. You’re beautiful. It’s not even about the way you look, it’s you. Your heart, that brain of yours. You keep me on my toes, Kitten. Life will never be dull for us.”

“He took so much from me, Logan. It made me feel like I wasn’t worth anything.” A tear slipped down her cheek.

I wiped it away with my thumb. “You are worth so much. Kitten, you are more than I could ever deserve.”

“I’m finally believing that.” She smiled weakly. “Sorry for this awful post sex conversation.”

“It’s not always going to be butterflies and rainbows right? This is real life. Neither of us are perfect, I for sure am as far from it as possible. I always want to know what you’re feeling.”  I wished so bad that I could find Scott and beat the shit out of him.

Grace’s phone vibrated in her purse. She rolled off the bed and went to grab it while I enjoyed the view of her amazing ass.

“Oh God.” She shook her head with a frown.

“What’s up?”

“John. He keeps texting asking how Hope is. I don’t want to be his go between.”

“Understandable. What are your thoughts about it all, it’s been a couple of weeks since it all happened and everything has sort of settled. Do you still feel as strongly?”

“Yes and no. I’m still so mad at him for betraying her like that. But I can feel his remorse. It’s not my decision to make, though, it’s all Hope’s.” She threw the phone on the bed and sank down next to me.

“Does she know what she wants?” I pulled her against me.

“No. I think the hurt is still too strong for her to see anything else right now. She barely eats anymore. My mom is worried.”

“I’m sorry. I know this is hard for all of you.” I pressed a kiss to her temple.

“It just feels like things have been blown apart. Hope’s a mess, and I have no idea how to help her put it all back together.” She threw her hands up impatiently.

“Just be there, honey. That’s all you can do. This isn’t your problem to fix. As much as you like to take on the world’s problems, sometimes you can’t.”

“The worst part about all of this is that I feel so damn guilty for being happy when her whole world just imploded.”

“You’re entitled to be happy, too. It doesn’t always have to be about your sisters. I never want to hear you compare yourself to Faith again. Ever. Maybe that douchebag you used to date thought you were less than perfection, but I am smarter than that. I can see who you really are, even when you’re hiding.”

She pulled the sheet around her as though she suddenly realized she was naked. “I don’t hide, Logan.”

“Don’t you? You hide all the time. You compare yourself to your sisters and even Fiona. None of them are you.”

“I know I’m me, Logan. I know exactly who I am. I’ll never be the supermodel that Faith is or as put together as Fiona. But I’m coming to terms with that. I finally feel comfortable with who I am.” Her voice rose. Color bloomed on her cheeks.

“Good. I don’t want you to be anyone else. If I wanted a Fiona, I could have one. Hell, I already did.” I pulled her toward me and smoothed the hair away from her face.

“Why did you want her to begin with?” She pulled away slightly and looked at me. I could feel her insecurity.

I sighed, “I don’t know. Fiona was just always there.”

“That explains when you were kids, but what about six months ago when she came back to you again?” She chewed her lip, as though she was afraid of what I would say.

“I don’t have an answer for that. Could be she told me all the right things. It was around the anniversary of Jackson’s death. I was sad, missing him. She preyed on that, on me. It didn’t last long, maybe a week. I woke up one morning and looked in the mirror and didn’t like what I saw. She always brought out the worst in me. So, Kitten, believe me when I say that I don’t want anyone else but you. Not Fiona, not anyone. You are the only person I want to be with.” I took her cheeks in my hands and searched her eyes to be sure she believed me.

“I believe you,” she whispered.

“Good. Never doubt the way I feel about you, Kitten.” I kissed her gently.

LOGAN WAS SO PEACEFUL IN
sleep. More so than I ever was. Like he had nothing to worry about in life. I traced the roadwork of his veins along his arm. I was in deep. It would kill me if he ever walked away.

I slid my finger up his arm to his shoulder and along his jawline. He was mine. This man who could have anyone he wanted. He wanted me as much as I wanted him.

I watched him sleep for a while longer, a faint smile on his lips every now and again. I hoped his dreams were of me. Since I had met him, I didn’t need a dream lover anymore, I just needed him.

Feeling restless, I got up and wandered out into the living room. I had pjs of my own to wear, but I had chosen one of Logan’s shirts instead. It skimmed the tops of my thighs as I walked barefoot through the dark living room.

I sat on the big comfy couch that overlooked the skyline. Thinking back to six months ago when I was barely alive. Dead inside. Only going through the motions. How had I even considered that living?

“Grace?” He came up from behind me. “What are you doing out here alone?”

“Just thinking.”

“About?” He plopped down next to me.

“My life. How much things have changed in the past year.” I played with the hem of my shirt.

“Tell me.” He rearranged us on the couch so my back was leaned against his chest.

“So much has changed. We talked about this before, but how I see myself has changed. I finally feel like I deserve someone like you. I’ve always wanted this. The kind of love that makes you feel like you can do anything, be anything. I finally found it with you.” I could feel myself getting choked up so I stopped talking for a moment. The steady rise and fall of Logan’s chest instantly relaxed me.

“I’m not saying that things are instantly going to change, because they for sure aren’t. I know it’s always going to be a struggle for me, seeing that I’m worthy of more.”

“I wish you could see yourself through my eyes sometimes,” he said in a wistful voice. I could feel him tense, restraining himself from flipping me around to face him.

“I think I finally am, Logan. I’m seeing that I can have more. And that it doesn’t matter that I don’t look like a model, or have my shit all together.”

“I wouldn’t like you near as much if you had all your shit together. It would make me feel like I was lazy for still being a mess.” He laughed.

“We can be a mess together,” I said softly. “There was a lot of damage done before you. It’s going to take time to undo it all, but I’m actually trying now. Before you came into my life, I didn’t want to try. I was content with my half-life, even though I secretly wanted more. You were more. It scared me to death, but God, I wanted it.”

He was quiet for a bit, both of us lost in thought.

“Things have changed a lot for me as well. I’m going to say this, though, Grace. Even from the start, you deserved me. It was me who didn’t deserve you. I was too fucked up in the head with all my one-night stand bullshit and rules. I think we both needed to realize how much of our lives were not being lived. In my case, I was the man who never used his heart. I never let anyone in until you. Even Shaileen couldn’t get through to me for the most part. I know it was partly because of the way I was brought up. My parents always being distant, being raised by nannies and housekeepers. I was lucky to have Leah, but I craved my mother’s touch and my father’s approval.” He stopped and kissed the top of my head, his fingers sliding through my hair.