The Lies That Save Us (The Broken Heart Series) (2 page)

“Listen…whoever you are…I work 24/7, I don’t eat, I don’t sleep and I don’t ‘
go
’ anywhere, especially with someone I don’t know.  Now, is there anything
else
I can get you?”

The smile never left.  His eyes playfully searched her face for what seemed like hours.  She hated his confident air.

“No,” he said, finally looking down at the empty plate and cup of cold coffee in front of him, “It was delicious.  Thanks.”

Trails of Tabasco Sauce circled the empty plate and, as usual, he’d eaten like he hadn’t seen food in weeks.

Alexa walked to the other end of the counter and began drying glasses.  As she placed the first glass in the cart, she felt a sharp poke in her side.

“Ow!”

“What’s the matter with you?”  The words came in a whispered hiss from Tahleah’s lips.  The girl’s creamy ebony skin, almond shaped black eyes and thick lashes, combined with her mass of shiny black curls, all added up to stunning beauty. Not to mention the perfect body she carried around so gracefully.

“He’s gorgeous!  Are you
blind
?  And he’s totally into you.  What does he need to do, get down on his knees and beg?”

“Even that wouldn’t work.  I’m not interested.”

Alexa dropped the glass into the cart, picked up another one and started drying it, much more vigorously than the first.

“You are crazy, girl.  If you’re not going for the gold, I’m gonna get me some.”  Tahleah smiled that smile she used when she was on the prowl.  She started walking toward the other end of the bar, much like a lion stalking a gazelle.  This time, a sandy haired, green-eyed, very well built gazelle.

“Go for it Tahl.   I’m sure the two of you will make a darling couple.”  Alexa muttered that last part under her breath.

It wasn’t that she abhorred affection.  She longed to wrap herself up in the comfort of a man’s arms.  She wanted to feel his breath on her face, to feel her blood pumping through her body.  What was it like to feel arms around her, wanting her, loving her?  Yes, she wanted to be in love, to feel loved.  But it wouldn’t work for her, not now.  Not ever.

She turned bitterly away as Tahleah finished her prize winning stalk and headed back toward Alexa.

“How’d that work for you?” asked Alexa with a forced smile.

“It didn’t.  It’s you he wants and I say go for it.  He’s even nicer up close.”  Tahleah turned and walked into the kitchen.

Alexa looked down the counter to where Ham and Eggs had devoured his meal.  She realized she didn’t even know his name.  The fact she was even curious about his name infuriated her.  He was the hottest thing she’d seen in her diner since opening.  That little factoid also infuriated her.   Still, after a month of his weekly invites, she wondered on this evening how it might feel to actually go out with him. 

She quickly pushed the idea from her mind and mentally kicked herself for even thinking of it.  It must have shown on her face.

“Ah,” said Tahleah coming back out of the kitchen and pulling off her apron, “he’s finally getting to you, is he?  You look completely frustrated and ready to pounce.  On him, I assume.”  Tahleah laughed lightly at her own joke and pushed against Alexa with her shoulder.  “Come on, Alexa.  You know you want to.”

“All I know is he’s driving me crazy, and not in the way you think.  I don’t know who he is, where he came from or why he showed up here.  I want him gone.  I want him to stop bothering me.  If I had money for a restraining order, I’d get one!”

She plopped the glass into the plastic holder and stopped.

“Hey, Tahl, could you watch the front for me for a minute before you go?  I just need to use the bathroom.”

“Sure.  But don’t be long…I’ve got a hot date, and I mean hot.  Well, not as hot as Ham and Eggs down there, but hot all the same.”

“Thanks.”

Alexa shoved the bathroom door open and stepped quickly to the wash basin.  She grabbed a paper towel and ran it under cold water from the tap.  Wringing out the excess she dabbed her forehead and cheeks with the cool water.  Glancing in the mirror she stared back at the pathetic woman standing there. 

“What’s the matter with you?  Get a hold of yourself, Alexa.  You’re bigger than this, better than this and smarter than this.” 

Throwing the wet towel in the trash, she grabbed another paper towel, dried her face and started for the door.  Inside her she knew she could handle this.  She tucked the pain carefully back into its spot in the back of her head, reveled in the strength she felt return to her ever vigilant heart, and pulled the bathroom door open.  She would survive this if it was the last thing she ever did.

She hurried back to the counter.  Ignoring Ham and Eggs pondering his coffee cup, she strode confidently to Tahleah. 

“Thanks, Tahl.  Have a nice evening, you horn dog.”

Tahleah laughed and nodded toward the gorgeous man still seated at the counter.

“Waste of a perfectly good opportunity, but you’re welcome.  And you’re not kidding me for one minute.  You didn’t go in the bathroom to pee.  We both know that.”  Tahleah smiled her sly, all knowing grin and grabbed her coat from the rack.  Heading to the door she called out, “See you in the morning.”

That evening, it was Alexa’s turn to close the diner.  Everyone had gone home and Ham and Eggs, who usually came only for breakfast, was just finishing up his dinner.  When he was finished, she took his plate, silverware and cup to the sink.  He stayed put at the bar, seemingly content to watch her work.

Alexa swept the floor, wiped each table and began wiping down the counter at the opposite end from where he sat.  She turned off the lights in the kitchen and then in the dining room, hoping Ham and Eggs would get the hint and leave. 

Turning off the last of the dining room lights she looked up to see him coming around the end of the bar.  In the dim glow cast from the street light, she could see his determination, his eyes smoldering.  It made her want to cry for help, except she didn’t exactly feel threatened.  Angry was probably more like it.  Why was he still here and what was he doing behind her counter?

She wanted to tell him to get out and never come back, to leave her alone, but her voice box rebelled and refused to utter even the smallest sound.  Maybe it was the look on his face, the heat in those sexy eyes, the soft beautiful lips, the firm set of his jaw. Any one of those things would have kept her voice tucked silently in her throat, and certainly did. 

With strong, confident strides he started toward her, never taking his eyes from her face.  He took her wrist in his warm, gentle grip, pulling her down the length of the counter and around the corner to the restroom hallway.

“Wh..what are you doing?  Let go!”

She knew she could have demanded with more force and he would have released her, but the warmth of his touch was weakening her resolve with each step. 

He stopped a few feet down the hallway.  His eyes softly explored her face as he smiled a kind, inviting smile.  He leaned her gently against the wall with her hands pinned over her head.  His demeanor was casual, even flirty, but his eyes exposed the fire burning inside him.  Alexa’s chest heaved in and out with short, uneven breathes. She tried her best to look angry as she studied his face.

“First of all,” he said as he stared intently into her eyes, “my name is Cayman, like the islands.  Last name is Richards.  Secondly, you’re beautiful and the most beautiful thing about you is you’re oblivious to the fact.  And third…”  He stopped talking and moved her head to one side with his own.

“You so very…” he began to softly kiss the contour of her neck.

“Stop it.” The words came in a hoarse whisper.

“…so very…badly…” his kisses traveled ever so slowly up her neck to the bottom of her chin.  She slowly raised her head in response.

“I mean it, stop.”  She could feel his body pressing against her; feel his heart racing in time with her own, sending her blood coursing through her veins.

“…so very badly…need…” The smooth, silky tone of his voice made her heart race.

“I…I said stop it.  Stop,” she moaned, helpless in his grip.

He brushed her ear with his lips, his ragged breathing hot against her, revealing his own fight with restraint.  With his face leaning against hers he whispered, “…need to be…kissed.”

Pulling slightly away from her, he faced her, just inches from her mouth.

She could feel her knees about to buckle and kept them locked through sheer will.  Her mouth was dry with fear and longing.  She attempted to regain her composure while trying to glare furiously.

“Let me go.”

“As you wish,” he spoke tenderly, releasing her hands and stepping back.

She lifted her arm to slap his face, but he caught it mid-air.

He smiled and leaned forward, kissing her on the forehead.

“You just let me know when you’re ready for that kiss.”

With that he turned and walked confidently from the hallway and out the door.  He strode from the diner, not once looking back.

She stood for a brief moment watching him go, hating his arrogance, loving his confidence, confused by both.  Swallowing hard, trying to force moisture into her mouth, she slowly slid down the wall collapsing in a pile on the floor.  The sobs came from her in great gasps, uncontrolled as she lay curled up in with her legs to her chest.  She was unable to stop the rush of emotion and could feel her heart breaking all over again.  Breaking for the loss of her father, the loss of her love, the loss of the lock she’d placed on it.  She couldn’t stop the tears or stem the tide of passion that swept through her, hidden for so long.

“No…no.  I said no.  Not ever again.  I…said…no.”

Chapter Two

She woke the next morning in her flat over the diner, her head pounding from the cheap vodka she’d used the night before to drown her pain.  She moved her head slowly and…what was that wonderful smell?  They had to be trying a new recipe in the kitchen, and it must be amazing to make it all the way into her bedroom. 

She heard a pot clang in the kitchen, her kitchen, in her flat.  She sat straight up in bed and immediately moaned grabbing her head to keep it from exploding right off her shoulders.  Once the room stopped spinning, she stood and made her way to her closet.  Pulling he
r robe off the hanger she quickly shoved her arms through the sleeves.  Wrapping the front around her and tying the sash, she moved slowly toward the door, one hand holding her throbbing head.

She was pretty sure whoever it was in her kitchen wasn’t there to hurt her, unless modern thieves and cutthroats cooked you breakfast before they robbed you blind.  She
slowly and quietly pulled her trusty bat from beneath her bed just in case.  Peeking around the corner and finding no one in the hallway, Alexa walked slowly into the kitchen.  She gasped in surprise.

Standing in her kitchen, wearing her apron and completely enjoying himself, was Ham and…er…Cayman. 
Cayman?
 

“What are you doing in my kitchen?  In my
house
?  How did you get in here?”  She could feel her anger rising faster than it should.

“Good morning, sunshine!” 
he said, way too cheerfully.  “Your friend Tahleah…”

“I should have known,” she muttered.  “I can’t wait to get my hands on her.” 

“…let me in and I even brought all my own groceries.”  He smiled proudly.

“Get out.”  She said firmly, her head pounding.

“You don’t look like you feel so good,” he said, “you need some coffee.  Sit down and I’ll get you some.”

“I SAID GET OUT,” she yelled as loudly as her head would allow.  Even at the lower decibels it was enough to make her drop the bat and cradle her head in pain.

Cayman was instantly at her side, holding her up. 

“You better sit dow- whoa!  What have you been drinking?” 
he said, waving his hand in front of his face.

Suddenly she realized what she must look like and that only served to feed the fire raging in her head.  She was angry, but clearly needed his help to the small kitchen table.

He set her gingerly in the chair and sat down across from her, looking worried.

“Are you okay?” 
he got up and poured her a cup of hot steaming heaven.  At least that’s what it smelled like when he placed it in front of her.  She could have sat there all day just smelling it. 

“Who
are
you?”  she looked up from the coffee and into those now familiar green eyes.  “And where did you learn to cook food that smells like that?”

“Shall we see if it tastes as good as it smells, M’lady?” 
he said standing and heading to the stove.

Alexa
’s eyes honed in on his backside as he sauntered into the kitchen.  Nice jeans, nice gluts, nice...  “No, I really mean it.  Who are you?”  She still cradled her head in her hands, trying to keep it from falling off her neck.

He finished dishing up breakfast and walked back to the table with a plate for both of them.  Setting them down, he slid into his seat.  Leaning forward with elbows on the table, he looked at her for a moment.

“I’m a friend, Alexa.  I was passing through Startup and stopped for some breakfast and there you were.  Hadn’t planned on returning to your diner, but then I saw you and I was hooked.  You really dress up this town, you piqued my interest.  So, here I am.”

His eyes were penetrating hers, clear to the back of her head.  He made her want to forget every promise she’d ever made to herself.  She wanted him to pick her up and carry her into the bedroom--.  She shook her head, forcing her thoughts back to the present.

“I don’t need friends, Cayman.  I have my diner and my friends there, and I don’t need anything else.”  She tried very hard to sound convincing. 

“You’re wrong, Alexa.  I’m sticking around for a while, so you may as well deal with it.  I’m going to keep asking you out until you accept.  Maybe after one date we’ll decide we’re not interested in each other after all.  But I’m not leaving until I know that for sure, and right now, I don’t know for sure.”

“Well, I can answer that little question for you right now.” She said her voice a pinch more sarcastic than she’d planned.  “We’re not compatible, we’re not ever going out and there’s no need for you to ‘stick around’, especially on my account.  You’re free to leave.  I give you my permission, as if you need it.”

The hurt on his face made her stomach clench.  He looked down at his food, the smile fading slowly from his face, laid his napkin beside the plate and stood up.  He looked around the room, walked to the door where his coat was hanging on the knob, picked it up, looked at her and left, closing the door quietly behind him.

Alexa hadn’t realized she’d been holding her breath since her little speech and with the closing of the door she let all the air out of her lungs.  She wanted to run after him and tell him to come back, that she was sorry to be so rude.  The look on his face killed her, and she had the gnawing fear she would never see him again.  What had she done?  Was it the right thing? 

“It was the right thing for me,” she said firmly to herself.  She slowly picked up the plates of untouched food and carried them to the sink, scraping the uneaten food into the disposal.  As she turned it on and watched it disappear down the drain, she said again, “it was the right thing for me.”

***

“You did WHAT?”  Tahleah was clearly stunned.

“Listen, Tahleah,” she said with warning in her voice, “don’t ever do that again.  Don’t EVER let a complete stranger into my house, or anyone for that matter without my permission.  Do you hear me?  That had better never happen again.”

“He may be gone for good now,” said Tahleah, ignoring her.  She was clearly exasperated.

“I can only hope so,” Alexa looked down the counter to the spot where Cayman usually sat.  It was breakfast, and his chair at the counter sat empty.

“Oh for crying out loud Alexa!  What were you thinking!  How could you let a fish like that get away?  I saw how you looked at him. I thought if I let him in there you might just acknowledge those feelings and give it a go.  I can’t believe you chased him away.”

“Believe it.  I feel great.”

“No you don’t.  You can’t even decide if you did the right thing.  It’s on your face plain as day.”  Tahleah stomped off in a huff.

Alexa wondered how Tahleah could know her so well.  Still, there was a clear void inside her and no amount of stomping, fussing or being hard to live with was going to change it. 

Just then Keith came through the door and headed to his seat.  He stopped when he saw her and said, “Why, Alexa, what’s wrong?  You look like you lost your best friend.”

“Oh good grief!  Have you been talking to Tahleah?” 

She grabbed the coffee pot and a menu and followed Keith around to his booth.

“Well, no, did she quit?”  he asked, obviously confused.

“No, she didn’t quit, but I told that Ham and Eggs guy to buzz off and leave me alone and now she thinks I missed out on the opportunity of a lifetime.”

“And you’re not so sure she isn’t right.”  Keith smiled, turning his coffee cup over.

“No, I’m absolutely sure I was right and---“

“Don’t play those games with me, young lady,” said Keith, “I’ve been around too long, and don’t have that much time left that I would enjoy the game now.  You liked him, and you know it.”

Alexa dropped dejectedly down in the seat across from Keith.  “Did I really blow it?  I can’t fall for anyone again, Keith.  I really can’t.”

Keith chuckled and looked down at his empty coffee cup. 

“How old are you?  Twenty-six?  Twenty-eight max?  Don’t you think that’s kind of a long time to be alone?  You may have to do that ‘kissing-the-frogs’ thing for a while, but you don’t have to sleep with every frog you kiss, and you don’t have to expect every one of them to turn into a prince.  But you could at least enjoy yourself along the way.  I need some coffee.”

Alexa sighed and reached across the table to pour the steaming coffee into his cup.

“I can’t, Keith.  I mean it; and I don’t
want
to.  I don’t want to deal with another human being in my life.”

“Yes, you do.” He said with determination.

“How do you--How could you even remotely know that?”

Keith looked at her across the table.  He picked up his coffee cup and took a slow sip, then put the cup back down on the table and stared into the dark liquid.

“I know that because there isn’t a human being on the face of this earth that doesn’t need to be loved.”  He looked into her eyes.  “You’re not betraying the memory of your father, nor are you giving in to a life you swore you’d never want.  Be
human
Alexa; live again.  Square your shoulders, take a deep breath and give it a go.  It’s a ride you can stop at any time.”

She set the menu down in front of him and squeezed his hand.

“Thanks.”

“For what?  Free advice from an old codger?  What’s that worth?”

Alexa laughed and headed back to the front of the diner.  She walked around the end of the counter and put the coffee pot back on the warmer.

She was standing with her back to the front door when the bells sent out the warning that someone had come in.  It was him, she knew it was him and she couldn’t bring herself to look.

She felt the warmth of his body move in behind her, leaning into her.

“Go out with me, just once,” he whispered in her ear.  “If you’re miserable I won’t ask you again.  Promise.”

Alexa softly put down the coffee cup and paused briefly.  She turned to him, placing her hands on his magnificent chest.

“I’m sorry I’ve been so rude.  You made that incredible breakfast for me and I didn’t even so much as thank you.  I’m…I’m truly sorry.”  Her eyes reached deeply into his, searching...questioning. 

“Yes, I’ll go out with you.  Just don’t be expecting anything more than a date.”

“Ha!”
laughed Cayman, “Are you questioning my most noble intentions?”

His laughter was music and it made her smile just to hear it.

“Yes.  Yes I am.  Now move it and let me get to work.”  She pushed him gently to the side and turned to pick up a menu.  Cayman walked around the end of the bar and sat down in his usual place. 

“I’ll have the #3 with coffee.”

***

That evening Cayman picked her up and they drove to the ‘famous’ ponds to throw a few rocks.  Alexa laughed when she heard where they were going and what they would be doing.

“I have to warn you,” she said playfully, “that was always my favorite date with my dad and I have a pretty good record at rock skipping.”

“Not as good as mine, I’ll wager,” he grinned back.  “I’ve got the record for my high school of eight.”

“Eight kids?  That’s not a very big high school.  Where’d you grow up, anyway?”
she teased, knowing full well what he’d meant.

“Very funny.  Eight skips.  That’s good and you know it.”

She smiled slyly at him, “Eight?  Really?  Well, that’s small stuff for me.  My record is ten.”

He pulled into the gravel parking lot and parked the car. 

“No way!  You couldn’t have gotten ten.  That is impossible.  No way.”

He got out and came around to her door and opened it.  As she stood up his hand went to the back of her neck and he pulled her into a kiss. He slid his hand down her back, to her waist, pulling her whole body into his.

Alexa wanted to run, she wanted to run so far no one would find her, but that kiss…  She couldn’t deny the warmth it sent rushing through her body. 

“You’ve got to stop doing that,” she said, “or I won’t be responsible for my actions.”

“I’ll take full responsibility for any actions you want to blame on me.”

With her last ounce of emotional strength, she moved away, her hand lingering in his.

The ponds were nestled amongst the beautiful fir trees native to the area.  There was a small beach all the way around them with trees and brush lining the beach.  Popular for camping and hiking in the height of the summer, the ponds drew people from all over the area.  Not many outsiders used them, as it was pretty much a secret kept by the locals.  It was beautiful and refreshing; a wonderful place to come and spend time thinking…but not tonight.

The two of them threw rocks until their arms felt like they were going to fall off, both competing against the other, trying for the longest skip.  Alexa won with five.