The Truth According to Us (2 page)

Jottie gazed at Marjorie Lanz for a moment, and then she leaned close. “My new boarder is a representative of the United States government,” she murmured. She looked suspiciously at Mr. Vogel. “That's all I can say.”

“Ooooh.” Marjorie clutched the sandal tight. “It's a
secret
?”

Jottie nodded regretfully, like she wished she could tell more, and turned toward Mr. Vogel. “That's a nice sandal you have there, Mr. Vogel. Does it come in blue?” He shook his head no. “That's too bad. Well, Marjorie, Willa and I had better be getting along. We have to clean out that new boarder's room. The United States government doesn't like a lot of clutter.” She looked at me. “They like it neat as a pin. Don't they, Willa?”

Out of pure loyalty, I nodded, and then I waited until we were three storefronts away from Vogel's Shoes before I asked, “Are we really getting a new boarder?”

“Yes, ma'am,” said Jottie.

“Is he really part of the government?”

She smiled. “No. 'Cause it's not a he.”

“A lady?”

“Yes. A lady.”

“A lady in the government?”

Jottie raised an eyebrow. “Sounds like you don't believe a word I said.”

“I do,” I said slowly. “But how come I didn't know about it?”

She reached out to brush my hair away from my face. “I thought you did know. Didn't you see me move all those things out of the closet? You were sitting right there on the bed.”

I tried to remember but I couldn't. I'd probably been reading.

I was usually reading.

It occurred to me that I missed an awful lot of what went on. Silly Marjorie Lanz knew more about my life than I did. Even smelly, powdery ladies on the street seemed to know things about my own father that I didn't. That was downright humiliating, now that I thought about it. Was I a mere baby, doomed to live in benighted ignorance? No! I was a person, a whole person, and I had a right to know things!

“You should have told me,” I fussed at Jottie.

She patted my cheek. “You want to know things, sweetheart, you've got to start paying more attention. You've got to keep your ear to the ground.”

I opened my mouth to say But I'm your confidante! Then I shut it up again. Maybe I wasn't Jottie's confidante, after all. Maybe I only imagined I was. I pondered. There was the man in the parade, Mr. McKubin, the one who made Jottie blush—she hadn't confided a thing about him. She hadn't even answered my question about him, because she'd gotten distracted by Miss Kissining. Except—I looked at Jottie in surprise—maybe it wasn't a mistake; maybe she'd done it on purpose to distract
me
!

Well!

The morning had been rife with unanswered questions. Mysteries, even. “Good thing old Felix ain't here.” What did that mean? And Mr. Russell—why had he gotten so angry when we said Father was away? And just who was this new boarder who worked for the government? Mysteries abounded, and the biggest one was why hadn't Jottie told me about any of them.

I'd been duped.

I'd thought I was Jottie's trusted adviser, the repository of her innermost thoughts. But I wasn't. I'd been fooled. Kept in the dark. Lulled and diverted. But no longer! I resolved to change. Then and there, I
made a vow to pay attention, to find out, to learn those truths that the grown-ups tried to hide. I will know things, I promised myself. I will get to the bottom of everything. Starting now.

I was just clenching my jaw with resolve when I felt a tug on my sleeve. There was Bird, her curls stuck to her head with sweat. “That Trudy Kane is going to dance again. I want to see and Mae says she's going to have a stroke if she has to watch Trudy Kane one more time, so you got to come with me.” Bird was trying to learn how to tap dance by watching Miss Trudy Kane. She could already shuffle off to Buffalo on a washtub. She yanked my arm. “Come on.”

I looked do-I-have-to at Jottie. She nodded.

“I don't see how I'm supposed to keep my ear to the ground when I have to spend every blessed moment of my life following Bird around,” I said bitterly.

Jottie was peering into the windows of Krohn's Department Store, but she turned to grin at me. “What you need is some of that Macedonian virtue,” she said. “You just summon up a little ferocity and devotion, and you'll find out more than you ever wanted to know.” She turned back to the windows.

Bird yanked on me again, but I stood stock-still. Jottie was right. Macedonian virtue was exactly what I needed.

 

May 17, 1938

Rosy,

Please forgive—can't come to luncheon. Father on warpath: Nelson, sloth, poorhouse, et cetera. Speaks ominously of work. Must stay home and knit socks to make good impression.

Layla

Ben,

Layla needs a job. Can I send her to you?

Affect
^ly
,

Gray

May 19, 1938

Senator Grayson Beck

Senate Office Bldg.

Washington, D.C.

Dear Gray,

No.

Sincerely,

Ben

May 20, 1938

Mr. Benjamin Beck

WPA/Federal Writers' Project

1734 New York Ave. NW

Washington, D.C.

Dear Ben,

I am disappointed by your answer. It reveals a lack of brotherly feeling, and a poor memory to boot. Think back, Ben. Think back to 1924. I did not think that it would be necessary to remind you of the time, the money, and the reputation I expended for your sake
and without question
during that summer, but evidently I was mistaken. Perhaps the jail cell has become hallowed in your memory, or perhaps you believe that the judge was inspired to lenience by your worthy ideals. Don't fool yourself. You owe me.

What time shall I send her up? Tuesday at 2:00?

Gray

May 21, 1938

Senator Grayson Beck

S.O.B.

Washington, D.C.

Dear Gray,

Tuesday at 2 is fine. What job do you want me to give her?

Ben

Ben,

I don't give a good goddamn what job you give her. I want her out of the house and off my dime.

Affect
^ly
,

Gray