The White Billionaire's Baby (BWWM Interracial Romance) (6 page)

“
I’m going to need some more time to think about that. I don’t know if I would want to be that far away from Cynthia or Sandy.”

“
We don’t have to make a decision now, it’s just something to think about,” I said.

I honestly had forgotten how close she was to her two friends. She rarely went a week without seeing either of them. They were her family,
 and she took family very seriously. I don’t know what she would do if she couldn’t randomly drive to one of their houses to go for a chat. Sometimes I think that’s the only thing that keeps her sane. I was probably going to have to find another solution for us. I guess if we were going to leave I would have to bring her friends along with us.

**

I rushed over to Cynthia’s place after I’d spoken to Kyle, and I was happy to find out that Sandy that was there as well. They still worked odd schedules even though they worked at our businesses. I guess that’s the nature of the industry, and I was grateful that they were available to me because I was still a little shaken up.

I still couldn’t get over how great it felt to drive to Hyde Park to see Cynthia. It fits her personality so much better than the west side of Chicago did. She adored her new neighborhood and couldn’t get over how friendly everyone was and how she could walk down the street at 2 in the morning and feel relatively safe. Sandy chose an apartment not too far from her and they were in walking distance from one another.

I walked up the steps to the huge brownstone 2 flat that she lived in. It was huge, and it had been renovated. I fell in love with it from the first moment that I saw it,
 and I could see why she was so set on having that particular one.

“
Hey girly,” she said as she greeted me at the door, “Oh no, what’s wrong?”

“
Do I look that bad?” I asked.

“
You don’t look bad; you look frazzled as if you’ve seen a ghost.”

“
I need to talk,” I said.

“
That’s what we’re here for. Sandy’s psycho ass is in the kitchen eating up all of my food,” she said.

“
Well, you’re about to have two psychos eating up all of your food because I’m hungry.”

Soon we were all sitting around her kitchen table eating pita chips and hummus. I wished that I had some wine to go along with it, but I was trying to stop using alcohol to deal with my anxiety. My mom used to use substances to deal with her problems, and that’s how she became a junkie. I didn’t want that to be my reality, and so I vowed to try to deal with my stress better.

“I got a death threat today,” I said.

“
From who?” Sandy asked immediately.

“
I’m not sure who it’s from but Kyle is going to trace it. We should have a good idea of who it is within the next couple of days. I don’t know why, but I really wasn’t expecting something like that.”

“
Not to be harsh or anything,” Cynthia said softly, “But Marcus has proven that you can’t put anything past him. He’s already done things that we never thought he would do. Now that he thinks you’ve betrayed him, the gloves are off.”

“
The gloves were already off when he started blackmailing her,” Sandy interjected.

I shook my head, “I don’t care what started this shit, and I just want it to be over.”

“So what’s going to happen from here?” Sandy asked.

I gave them the rundown of what Kyle and I had planned. I also let them know that a security detail was sitting outside of the house. It was a necessary evil for the time being.

“It’s going to be okay. They’re just thugs, and they’re not used to dealing with anyone outside of their tiny little box. They will get a lot more than they bargained for if they try to mess with you. Kyle doesn’t strike me as the kind of person to take these things lightly,” Cynthia said.

“
He was pretty upset when he found out about the threats. I don’t think that he’ll do anything stupid, but I know that he won’t allow anything to happen to me either. I’m just so mad that I’ve brought that hood drama to his doorstep. He shouldn’t have to deal with this shit,” I said.

“
No one should have to deal with this shit,” Sandy said, “But it’s the hand that you’ve been dealt. You’re worth the trouble, so stop worrying about what he has to deal with.”

“
She’s right. Kyle is a very intelligent man and he isn’t going to do anything that he doesn’t want to. So calm the hell down and allow him to be there for you,” Cynthia said.

“
I’m trying to let him. But I haven’t told him about how terrified I am.”

“
What’s scaring you?” Cynthia asked.

“
I really don’t want to testify against Marcus. We’ve been through so much together and for it to end like this…it’s tearing me apart on the inside,” I admitted.

“
This situation isn’t your fault. He’s the one that put you in this predicament, and you had to do what was best for you. He didn’t care about betraying your trust. Don’t feel guilty that you’re the one that came out on top. You won and so you need to enjoy your victory,” Sandy said cold heartedly.

She was absolutely right
 but that didn’t make it any easier to process. I loved Marcus with all of my heart and I thought that he was going to be the man that I grew old with. I didn’t want to be the reason that he was locked away for a long time, even with the threats. But it was clear that I had to choose between him and Kyle. That wasn’t a tough decision at all because Kyle held my heart. I had to do whatever it took to make sure that Marcus couldn’t harm my future. I just wish he had never done all this in the first place.

***

Talking to friends was great but i
t
didn’t do much to calm my nerves. I was just ready to get the whole ordeal over with. My hands were still shaking, my heart was still pounding, and my stomach was still in knots. Wine was a temporary savior, but the effects were quickly wearing off and I was left alone with my over reactive body. My thoughts were racing as I lay across our huge bed. Emotional exhaustion was something that I was learning the meaning of. I groaned as I thought about all of the cameras that were going to be in my face in the morning. The new security guards had managed to thwart the few that had approached me as I got out of my car in our parking lot.

I was enveloped in darkness, and our thick down white comforter had become my source of comfort. I wished that Kyle was home with me so that I could cuddle with him. We only had one last huge hurdle before we could get married, and it seemed like a mountain. I’d been prepped so much by our lawyer and his assistants. They told me that the defense was going to try to discredit me and destroy me on the stand. I just had to be strong and tell the truth. That seemed so much easier said than done, especially since I hated talking about my past. I’ve justified it by saying that I didn’t have any other choice, but I couldn’t help but think about the lives that I helped destroy.

I hated what my neighborhood had done to my mother, and I helped to perpetuate the same cycle. I didn’t feel like I was any better than Marcus even though I’d never literally sold the drugs. However, I helped facilitate the distribution of narcotics in my own neighborhood. I helped create the very thing that I hated. I felt like I deserved to be in prison right along with Marcus. That level of guilt alone was enough to make me want to crawl under a rock and never show my face again.

Kyle showed up while I was in the middle of my pity party.

“Camille?” He asked before he cut on the bed lamp, “Are you sleeping?”

I played around with the idea of pretending to be asleep. I wasn’t in the mood to have a full conversation about my feelings. I just wanted him to crawl into bed and hold me.

“No,” I responded, my voice was muffled from beneath the bed sheets.

“
Are you okay? Did something happen? I’ve been calling you for the last couple of hours.”

“
I’m sorry,” I said as I emerged from the comforter, “I forgot to take my phone off silent.”

He looked visibly relieved, but his face was still full of concern, “I’m worried about you. I hope you know that I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”

I wanted to tell him that there are certain things that money can’t protect you from. If someone wanted you bad enough, they could get you, and it didn’t matter who you tried to use as a shield. However, that wasn’t a reality that I wanted to share with him because I didn’t want to sound negative, and I didn’t want to shatter his world. I just hoped that the threats were idle and that they didn’t see me as worth it. I didn’t know how long it would take them to pinpoint where the person sent the message from. It was probably just one of Marcus’ idiotic friends.

“
I’m really nervous about tomorrow,” I said.

“
Yeah, Bill and the prosecutor said that they’ve been trying to call you too.”

I shrugged, “I don’t want to prepare anymore. I’m freaked out enough already, and he will only make it worse. I will see him bright and early in the morning, and we can go over things then.”

“Okay, I’ll let him know to back off.”

I appreciated how he didn’t question me any further about it. I didn’t want to argue, and I definitely didn’t want to be forced to do it. I didn’t have it in me to be nice about it anymore. If Bill asked me one more question I was going to bite his head off, figuratively of course. No one deserved my nervous wrath because it would be one of cataclysmic proportions. My temper can be very short when I’m nervous, and I would potentially ruin Kyle’s working relationship with Bill if he pushed me any further.

“Thank you,” I said in relief.

“
You know what will help you?” Kyle said with a mischievous glint in his eye.

“
What?” I asked warily.

“
A spanking.”

“
Are you kidding me? How in the hell is a spanking going to help me at a time like this? That seems like something that would be more for you and not myself. I’m not in the mood for that kinky shit tonight,” I snapped.

My attitude didn’t deter him, “Tsk tsk tsk Camille. I’ve warned you about that little snarky attitude, but I am very serious about what I’ve offered. Have you ever heard of spanking therapy?”

I scoffed. The only spanking therapy that I knew of was the ass whippings that I received from my mother when I was younger. Black parents used that kind of therapy all the time, and I wasn’t about to allow him to whip me like I was an unruly kid. He was really annoying me with his suggestion.

“
No, I’ve never heard of the shit. It sounds crazy, and I don’t see how something like that could even help me.”

He raised an eyebrow, and I realized that I’d maybe gone too far, “It’s very real and I think it that it will help refocus you and relieve some of your stress, at least for tonight.”

“I don’t know,” I said hesitantly.

“
Do you trust me?”

“
Of course I trust you,” I responded immediately.

“
Okay, then let me help you,” he said as he took off his shoes.

My pulse raced as I thought about really allowing him to spank me. It was something that we’d done during sex or as a precursor to sex. But this time felt different, it was a completely different kind of surrender.

“Am I going to have to lay over your lap?” I asked.

“
Yes,” he laughed, “You are going to have to lay over my lap. This can be a very therapeutic and intimate experience if you’ll just give in. Will you try it once? If you hate it then we’ll never do it again but I think it’s worth an honest try.”

“
How many other women have you done this ‘therapy’ with?” I asked.

“
One,” he said honestly.

My face scrunched because I hated the thought of him being with another woman even if it was just spanking. I scolded myself for asking the question that I wasn’t ready to know the answer to. But now that I think about it, I realize that it would have nagged me for days and so it’s good to just rip the band aid off from time to time. It’s okay to be upset with an answer that you asked for as long as you don’t punish the person for telling the truth.

I sighed, “Alright, I don’t really have anything to lose but my self-respect so I guess I’ll do it.”

“
Someone is being a little dramatic,” he said in amusement.

I pouted, “I know I’m being a big baby right now but cut me a little slack. I did have my life threatened.”

“I know, and I’ll do everything within my power to keep you safe. But for now, it’s just you and me so let’s enjoy it,” he said as he walked over to the bed and sat on the edge.

I sat up and pulled my legs to my chest, “Are you sure that this is going to help?”

“I’m not absolutely sure because it’s really up to you. I wouldn’t have suggested it if I thought that it wouldn’t. So come on, lay over my lap with your butt in the center.”

My eyes widened, and I took a few deep breaths to gather myself. I felt like such an idiot in that moment. What grown ass woman willingly submits to a non-sexual spanking? But then again, Kyle and I had done a lot of things that the average couple probably didn’t do. It seemed kind of ridiculous to draw my line there. I pushed the comforter down to my feet and looked at him as he waited patiently. I hated when he got quiet because that meant that he wasn’t going to entertain my bullshit anymore. I’m used to talking my way out of everything, and that’s hard to do when the person won’t give you an opening. .