An April Bride (10 page)

Her mother opened the door and peeked inside. “What are you up to so early in the morning?”

Stella lifted the thick wedding journal. “Double-checking.”

Her mother came in and sat down on a seafoam-green slipper chair next to the white desk. “How you doing, honey?”

“I’m okay,” Stella said. “Marsh has called me every day this week. He told me he helped his dad with some yard work and that he’s beginning to consider what he’ll do now that he’s home. He’s still interested in real estate.” Her wry smile hid her concerns. “He has a business degree, if he can remember what he learned in college.”

“That sounds positive. He’s planning for the future, so I’m sure he’s beginning to remember a lot.”

“Yes, he is making plans,” Stella said. She shut the journal. “I just don’t know if I’ll be in that future. I think the whole town is holding its breath on this wedding.”

“No, the whole town is praying toward this wedding,” her mother said on a soft, sure note.

Stella thought her mother was incredible, so calm and confident, so positive and encouraging. She’d be lost without the love of her parents.

“I should have stopped it the day he came home, but I was so in shock, and I kept hoping.”

“Honey, he didn’t want to hurt you. Kitten said that’s why he wouldn’t let them tell anyone. He wanted to be the one to tell you, so you could work through this together. That indicates he cares a lot about your feelings. He loves you.”

“He’s being a gentleman, Mama. Marsh has always done the right thing. He’s that kind of man.”

“Well, my heart assures me he’ll be the man who promised to marry you, because somewhere in his scarred heart, he still loves you.”

“Do you think he’s afraid to show that love?”

Her mother got up and ran a hand over the wedding dress hanging in the protective garment bag on the old armoire. “War does strange things to a person. We can’t know what he went through, but . . . he lost some of his best friends in that awful explosion. He survived, but he might feel guilty for that, and yes, he might be afraid now. Afraid to love again, to show his true feelings. A brave, strong man like that can hide a multitude of repressed emotions. You just need to be patient, no matter what happens.”

Stella got up and gave her mother a hug. “I love you, Mama. You always say exactly what I need to hear.”

“That’s part of my job, suga’.” Her mother fluffed her
short brown hair. “Now I’m off to get my hair done. Do you have any plans other than work for the weekend?”

“I don’t know,” Stella admitted. “I’m kind of in limbo about everything.” She touched a hand to the journal. “Mama, I told Marshall something the other night, something I can see now.”

“What, honey?”

“I’ve been so involved in planning this wedding. I poured myself into this the minute he went back over there. For the last ten months, I’ve focused on the ceremony, the reception venue, the food, the invitations, my dress, my attendants—everything to do with this wedding. It’s all in here.”

“That’s part of being a bride.”

“But . . . somewhere in there, I forgot about the groom.”

“Honey, you wrote him almost every day, and you told him all about the plans.”

“I did, that’s true. I tried to include him, to keep him up-to-date.”

“So what’s bothering you?”

“I managed to forget what he was going through. I think I subconsciously forgot he was in danger, and I used our wedding as my shield. I got so wrapped up in getting married, I forgot about being married. I forgot about my groom and his feelings.”

Her mother smiled over at her. “You’ll learn that as you go into this marriage. You have to consider each other always. You just need to keep God at the center of all your decisions and he will help you.”

Stella took a glance at her dress. “It’s not a fairy tale, is it?”

“No, I’m afraid it’s not,” Mama replied. “But . . . being married to someone you love and respect is better than a fairy tale. It’s the truth and happiness, tears, love, and sometimes conflict and trouble. But it’s worth it. You know that, right? You aren’t having second thoughts, are you?”

Stella shook her head. “No. I still love him. I’m willing to fight for him. But I need him to fight for me too.”

“He has, darling. And he still is—fighting for you and for the life God has planned for both of you.” She tapped a hand on the full-skirted dress. “You’ve never been the patient type, but this is certainly a lesson for you to learn and then grow. Sometimes all you can do is wait and pray.”

After her mother left, Stella finished her checklist and put her wedding journal back on her desk. She had a full day at the bookstore with enough work to keep her mind off her troubles.

“I have no troubles,” she repeated to herself as she finished getting dressed. “I just need to be patient.”

Her cell buzzed as she was about to walk out of her room.

Marshall!

“Hi,” he said, his tone tentative. She prayed each day to hear the old Marshall’s confident voice.

“Hi. How are you?”

“I’m good. Dad and I went fishing yesterday. I remembered how to bait a hook, at least.”

“That’s great.” She didn’t know what else to say.

“Hey, I was thinking, how about you and I go someplace private tomorrow? Somewhere away from here and different.”

“You mean, like a date?”

“Yes, like a date. I actually think I remember how to go on a date.”

“That would be nice,” she said, her heart doing a tug-of-war. “What time?”

“How about all day?”

“All day? Are you sure you’re up to that?”

“Yes. I need to get away for a while. With you.”

So he needed some space. Understandable. “Do you need me with you? Or would it be better if you took some time to be alone?”

“I want to be with you,” he said. “If you want to be with me, I mean.”

“I do,” she said, unable to say no to him. “I’ll have to make sure my aunt can cover for me at the bookstore since it’s a Saturday. I’ll call you and let you know, and if I can go, I’ll be ready bright and early.”

“Okay. Good. Are you off to work?”

“Yes. Busy day. We got in another new shipment. I have to shelve all the books.”

“Okay. I’ll call you later.”

She put away her phone and hurried out the door. A whole day with Marshall. The man was trying, she’d give him that.

“But I need you back,” she said as she cranked her car and headed into town. “I need you back, Marshall.”

“So, I thought we’d go to the zoo in New Orleans.”

Stella’s surprise must have shown on her face.

“Is that okay?”

“Yes.” She grinned. “You took me there years ago, when we officially started dating in high school. You’d just gotten your driver’s license and wanted to take a short road trip. Did you remember that?”

“Yes. And no one told me about it. Mom and I were talking about how you love animals and I remembered being with you at the zoo. I guess it’s in there somewhere.” He tapped his temple and winked at her. “Maybe my brain is beginning to work again.”

Stella sent up a silent prayer to that end.

Marshall maneuvered his dad’s car through the interstate traffic. “I can’t remember the last time I came into the city,” he said. Then, realizing his slip, he started laughing. “I can’t remember much of anything.”

Stella’s expression changed from cautious to smiling. “You know, laughter is good for the soul. I’m glad you can laugh at yourself.”

“Me too. Some days are better than others.”

“How’s your therapy going?”

He changed lanes and glanced over at her. “Pretty good. I’m blessed to find a good therapist close to home. And I’ve been talking to Reverend Howell a lot. He comes by the house to check on me.”

“Really? That’s good. He’s so easy to talk to.”

“Have you talked to him—about us?”

Stella shifted in her seat. “I did when you were gone, of
course. And . . . after I found out what had happened to you. He’s been wonderful. He’s a good listener.”

“He suggested we come back together to give him an update.”

“We could do that. Maybe tomorrow afternoon, if he’s free.”

Marshall checked the speedometer. “All we talk about is me and my lack of a memory,” he said. “I know it’s there between us, but for today can we pretend everything’s okay? I need a normal day.”

“A normal day?” She wagged a finger at him. “You make me sound so boring.”

“No, not boring. Just a day that’s quiet and fun and . . . with no pressure.”

“I can do that.” She sat still, her hands in her lap. Then she lifted her head and closed her eyes.

Marshall watched her, thinking she looked so pretty with the sunlight moving over her as the car sped along the road.

“What are you thinking over there?”

“I’m thinking I’m with the man I love and it’s only three weeks until we can begin our life together. And that today will be a carefree, relaxing day without wedding worries or anyone asking imposing questions.”

Marshall didn’t respond, but he wanted a day with no worries too. He could only think of the here and now, today.

“What are
you
thinking?” she asked, her eyes on him now.

He hesitated, but then decided he had to be honest. “I’m thinking I’m with an amazing woman who takes my breath away, and that no matter what happens down the road, today will always be special to me.”

Stella’s expression changed from one of expectancy to disappointment to acceptance. “Are you taking me away from everything and everyone so you can break up with me, Marshall?”

M
arshall’s frown filled with confusion. “What do you mean?”

Stella pivoted on the seat and leaned against the door. “You’re making such a production about this, I figured you wanted to get me away from everyone to save me a lot of embarrassment. I know I can be a drama queen, but if you’re expecting theatrics, you can rest assured I’m stronger than I look.”

His frown intensified with each word. “You think I went to all this trouble just so I could break up with you?”

“Isn’t that what this is about?”

“No,” he said, now with a scowl showing his disappointment and anger. “Why would I be so cruel?”

“Because you don’t want to hurt me or embarrass me. But if we call off the wedding, everyone will know anyway. I’ll have to return all the gifts and call the caterer. I’ll have to . . . sell my dress or at least pack it away. The whole town
will know, Marsh. So just tell me now and get it over with. I can handle all that as long as you’re honest with me.”

Marshall pulled the car off at the next exit and found an empty parking lot by a little roadside park. He sat still for a few moments before he shut down the engine and opened his door, and then he came around and opened her door.

“Marsh?”

“Stella, get out of the car, please.”

Was he really going to let her down easy right here in this deserted parking lot?

She swallowed the growing lump in her throat and slowly slid out of her seat. Wiping her sweating hands on her jeans, she leaned back on the car, her knees turning to noodles.

“Go ahead. I’m ready.”

She held her head down, prepared to take her lumps and then start to pick up the pieces of her life.